


There will be the time to crack another smile...

by LittleDevil, SunnyFeeling



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Depression, Dragons, Drug Abuse, F/F, F/M, HE, Hehehe, Hurt Stiles, I decided that stiles is fucked, M/M, Magical Stiles Stilinski, Panic Attacks, Poker Nights, Scars, Scott is a Failwolf, Self-Discovery, Sheriff is sad and thinks it´s only his fault, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Stiles cuts all ties, Stiles is Pushed Out of the Pack, Stiles is pan, and, and a lot of selfloathing, bad language, but it´ll take some time, but i´m someone for bittersweet endings, definitely and always, did i say dragons, different POVs, female witches too, hahahahahahha, he is going to ignore all his problems, i have so many adventures mapped out for stiles in my head, is a magical genius but he´s gonna need a pacemaker, just a typo, like really, male witches because fuck you, not sure yet - Freeform, of course, of course this will end nice, ok since it´s important to know, poor guy, post 5A, soon there might be drugs, sunnyfeeling says I´m an evil person and I don´t deserve love, tagging as a go, this is maybe ending well or not, um yes, uuh I mean awful, whom am i kidding, yes it´s going to be awesome, you might find fandom easter eggs
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-19
Updated: 2016-10-20
Packaged: 2018-05-02 08:53:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 25,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5242283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleDevil/pseuds/LittleDevil, https://archiveofourown.org/users/SunnyFeeling/pseuds/SunnyFeeling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The day after Scott throws him out of the pack Stiles thinks it can´t get worse. If it had been Derek, well Stiles may have expected that but no, it was Scott. His father believes him to be a murderer when really he just defended himself. Everybody believes Theo. Fucking asshole. Why wouldn´t they though- he is charismatic. But also evil. Too bad they couldn´t see that. Well,  even Stiles sometimes makes mistakes.<br/>But Stiles is already gone. Fleeing into his own fucking adventure. Sure if he was being truthful he just couldn´t take it anymore...but! we´re not talking about that. Or the nightmares and panic attacks when he´s alone.No. It´s an adventure. There are dragons, witches and magicians and this effing annoying medium who keeps on insisting Stiles needs to go back. Well fuck him. NO. Even if his dead mother agrees.<br/>Sooner or later his past will catch up. Stiles prefers it to be later. Maybe the problems will solve themselves (as fucking if). But at the moment he is on a quest and nobody can stop him. <br/>Or how Stiles became a powerful mage and made them regret their poor life choices.</p><p>Was ratet M for language and sex but honestly graphic sex scenes are so far away right now</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In the middle of the darkest nights

**Author's Note:**

> The title is a line from 'Tragedy Time' by Rise Against which you really should check out because it was definitely a mayor inspiration and is also a really beautiful song. Like listen to it. It´s about depression and about overcoming it.
> 
> My beautiful beta is Sunnyfeeling - she spend 3 hours with me discussing the first chapter  
> You should know that I write this fic to end it as the first story i´ve ever finished so please - if you like it - make me continue - send threats or pleas, i´ll really try. Promise!
> 
> In regards to mistakes please know that neither me nor sunnyfeeling are native speakers. We may be fluent but we make mistakes. We discuss grammar and sometimes we´re not sure but we do our best. So if you find that we´ve made a horrible mistake, one that sounds too terrible to not say something - let us know and we´ll correct it.

**October the 1st, 2013**

 

‘Don´t worry about Malia or Lydia, I´ll find them… Maybe… maybe you should talk to your dad.’

These few words uttered by Scott in the rain were the beginning of the end. Of course things were shit before but they had only gotten worse. Stiles could feel his heart cracking. Somewhere in his heart he had known that Scott wouldn´t understand why he had to do it. Scott never had to kill anyone. That had always been done for him. The worst thing was that Scott acted like none of the others had ever killed before when he confronted Stiles about Donovan´s death. Derek had killed and Scott still trusted him. Allison had even tried to kill Scott but he still loved her.

Yet, after all they´ve been through Scott had left him there standing in the rain. He hadn´t even been able looked into Stiles eyes. Scott just ended their friendship of 13 years in less than 5 minutes. Stiles had to admit though that he had seen it coming, subtly of course but that didn´t numb the pain.

 

‘I came for Void Stiles.’

Stiles didn´t doubt Theo´s words. Nor was he in any way surprised by them. Why would he be? He had felt it when he first met him. Theo shouldn´t be trusted. Not even with a rubber duck. But did anyone listen? Of course not. He felt so bitter about it. He had given them evidence, but did they even look at it? No. He was imagining things. Of course. Why hadn´t they figured out by now that he was usually right about the important things? He sure as hell wouldn´t give Theo what he wanted. But he was afraid. Very afraid. Deep within he could still feel the darkness. The Nogitsune hadn´t just randomly chosen him. Stiles knew that, and although he fought very hard to keep it at bay his darkness sometimes got the better of him. Like when he punched Theo right in the face. Bastard. It was exactly what he wanted Stiles to do. To give in.

 

‘You can save only one of them. Your father or Scott.’

When Theo told him his plans all Stiles could think was ‘Wow. What a surprise.’ Of course Theo wanted Scott dead. The righteous, true alpha. What a joke. More like true hypocrite. He was worried how Lydia, Malia and Liam were doing. They were in Danger too, but when Theo mentioned his father, he didn´t even have to think about it. Not really at least. Scott didn´t need him. He had made that clear. Very clear. Crystal clear. The others weren´t in immediate danger. Besides his dad was neither a banshee nor a werewolf much less an alpha. So he rushed to his father as fast as he could, while trying to waste no thought on Scott and the others. Of course he felt guilty about it.

 

‘Sti.. Stiles?’

His dad whispered.

‘Yes Dad, I´m here. Don´t worry.’

His dad just nodded and then closed his eyes. Stiles put his dad´s head on his lap. Blood was everywhere and Stiles feared for his dad´s life. He checked for his father’s heartbeat. It was faint but steady. Letting out a deep sigh he searched for his phone. Then he heard Scott do the Alpha Roar. That never meant anything remotely good. He felt even worse. What if anything had happened to them? Worry and wrath at equal parts threatened to consume him. He was one step away from standing up to get his baseball bat and find Theo when he regained control. What would he do with Theo? He was an artificial were coyote. Stiles couldn´t even do that fancy mountain ash trick. Theo was stronger and faster. Ultimately he just wanted Stiles to lose control give in to his darkness. Stiles would do no such thing and besides his father was still lying heavily wounded and unconscious in his lap. Groaning he phoned for an ambulance.

Just as he had finished describing the situation and his location his dad woke up again. He ended the call after he told them to hurry.

‘Stiles, why´d you kill Donovan?’

He could see the disappointment in his father´s eyes. It was unbearable. Black dots started to darken his vision. He fought the panic that was building in his chest. Not now. Please, not while his father was present. He deliberately breathed in and out, trying to calm himself. Finally he managed to answer his dad.

‘Dad, he was going to kill you! I couldn´t let him do that. I mean..’

Stiles shook his head hoping his dad would understand him but the disappointment didn´t go away, if anything it got worse.

‘Stiles…’

His dad took a ragged breath.

‘He was only a kid…’

Stiles scrambled away from his dad and onto his feet.

‘No not you, too. No Dad, no. There was no other way Dad. I had to..’

His phone fell to the floor. He needed to get out of here. Fast. He ignored the hiss of pain his father gave when Stiles put his head back on the floor. There was only so much emotional stress he could take right now.

‘Stiles…? What are you doing? Wait!’

His dad called after him as he backed away towards the steps. Stiles couldn´t look at his dad anymore. Not into his eyes. They were probably full of sadness, desperation, disappointment and grief. As if John Stilinski couldn´t believe what his only son had turned into. Stiles couldn´t take this from his father. The father who had always loved and believed in him no matter what. So, he fled. Maybe he was a coward. He didn´t care. He wasn´t going to cry about it. At least not now.

‘Wait, Stiles please!’

Stiles could hear his father calling out for him a few more times, even heard him groaning in pain when he probably tried to get up. But Stiles stayed upstairs at the front door waiting. Tears on his face. Trying to keep it all in. Keeping the tears in. It wasn´t easy but he managed. Stopped thinking. Forced himself to stop feeling. Became numb enough to stay in front of the house, waited for the medics while ignoring his father. When they came and took his father away to the hospital he declined to go with them. He told the officers he would drop by the station later. Feeling the reproachful stare of his dad in his back as he walked home.

Stiles hadn´t even told his father goodbye.

He felt guilty about that, too.

He showered and changed, packed his duffel bag with everything he would need. The time had finally come. He finally couldn´t take it anymore. They didn´t want him here. They didn´t trust him. They all believed Theo. He couldn´t help them. He had been strong long enough. Stiles didn´t want to be strong anymore. He wanted to be left alone. Before leaving he called the hospital to see if his father was fine and after being told, yes indeed the Sherriff would survive his injuries, Stiles made his way to the bus station. He emptied his bank account and withdrew 5,000 $ from his college fund on the way there. After that he bought a bus ticket to San Francisco.

 

The bus ride took about 5-6 hours. Stiles didn´t pay attention to it. He had been sitting on a window seat staring numbly into the distance for most of the ride. The whole time telling himself to not feel anything. To keep it in. To keep his face blank and his movements slow. To be unremarkable, insignificant enough for people to oversee and ignore him. And he did well. Nobody talked to him. Nobody even looked at him. Mentally Stiles was about to give himself a pat on his shoulder when he realized that his father would have no clues as to what had happened to him. He didn´t want to be found. Neither did he want his father to believe he was taken. Then he ignored the thought. His father was probably going to be happy that he had left. The Sheriff wouldn´t have to charge his own son with murder.

He got off the bus at San Francisco main station and considered finding a cheap hotel but decided against it. He would rest as soon as he was out of the state. Or maybe two states away.

After studying the timetables of various buses and trains he settled for Denver and boarded the Californian zephyr.

It took the train nearly 32 hours to reach its destination. During these 32 hours Stiles didn´t sleep. He just looked out of the window. Numb. Empty. Detached. Exhausted. But above all tired of all this shit.

Two days after his father had been wounded Stiles got off the zephyr in Denver. It was early in the evening and so he ventured out to find a place to stay as well as something to eat. Even though he wasn´t hungry, he just knew that he had to eat something if he didn´t want to pass out. So he just ate a burger in a cheap diner that tasted like cardboard. He started to feel sick, but forced himself to keep it in. Especially since he had to be economical with the money he had left for he had plans with it.

It took his dad about three weeks to realize that he hadn´t been taken but rather left on his own. By then Stiles was already on the other side of the world. Or at least that´s what it felt like. It was only by chance, that he saw his picture shown on national television. His father had done an interview on all the unsolved murders and all the missing children. At least John stated that he was missing. Not a murderer on the run. After that he made sure to never look at the public screens again.

It  broke his heart to know that his father was thinking, he murdered Donovan, even if he covered it up in national television. Or when he remembered the unbelieving and disappointed stare with which his father had looked upon him.

He also thought about his friends, about Scott. His ex-best-friend. He was sorry for leaving Malia without saying anything even though she didn´t even judge him for killing Donovan. But he couldn´t bring himself to check on Beacon Hills. Or call them. He just kept fleeing.

Stiles wouldn´t have called himself suicidal it this point. He just didn´t care about anything anymore except for not being forced to return or to think about them. After some time he moved on, hitchhiking to Kansas City, then further northeast until he reached Chicago.

__________________________________________________________________________

**October the 15th, 2013**

 

Chicago. The windy city. Yeah it was fucking windy. And cold. The sound of the wind made his nightmares only worse. Every night he would wake up about 5 times. Often screaming. Well, usually screaming. He slept in motels but soon stopped because his neighbors tended to get suspicious or worse, pissed.

The first thing he did was making sure to get a passport and a driver’s license, obviously not with his real name on it, or his real age. Because let´s face it. He was only 17 years old. There would be too many questions asked. It took 2 days and cost him 4,000 $. He made sure to get really good ones. With what was left he bought a new car. Well a new Jeep. He couldn´t resist. It brought back good memories. Memories of his mother before she was really ill. Memories of his dad and of Scott before… before all of this. It was black though. Like that place where my heart used to be, he thought grimly.

He had been in Chicago for 9 days before he was cornered by the local pack. They had waited for him at his jeep after he came back from another failed job interview as a shop assistant.

‘You are no werewolf.’

Their alpha said, eyebrows raised. What´s with the fucking eyebrows!? Like why!? Why always the fucking eyebrows with the fucking alphas?!

‘That’s very observant of you. But you know, I have no quarrel with you. I´m leaving now, since I´m just a fragile useless human.’

It came out very bitter and he didn’t really believe it himself. He had more blood on his hands then any of his friends. Although he was the only real human. While he walked towards his Jeep in an attempt to leave he hoped the alpha couldn’t smell the guilt he was feeling. Well he did. Shit.

‘ If you have no quarrel with us, why are you smelling guilty and lying about being fragile?’

Stiles backed away a little. He was way too tired for this shit, not having really slept for months. Since Allison´s death. Not death. Murder. Since he had murdered her.

‘The events of my past are none of your concerns. I have no quarrel with you. I will not hinder you, neither will I try to hurt you or your pack in any way. If it goes my way, we never have to meet again. I want only peace. I want to forget. So please, leave.’

The Alpha rubbed his temples. Fucking shit. Fucking Sourwolf eyebrow game. Well he gave his best `mentally sound if somewhat strange’ (Deaton) impression. He supposed it pissed the werewolf off just enough.

‘You´re telling the truth. Still, although you´re human it would have been nice to ask in advance whether you could live here. You can stay for now.’

Yeah, well, how was he as a non-werewolf supposed to find the freaking pack? This guy was funny. As the alpha reached into his pockets Stiles took a step back.

‘This is the address of a friend. He´s a witch and could help you control that magic of yours.’

Then he turned to his pack and nodded.

‘We´re leaving’

Stiles stood at his Jeep, totally flabbergasted. Why did they know about his magic ?

Moreover how were they able to still smell werewolf on him after nearly 4 weeks? Granted he hadn´t been able to wash his clothes very often but he had washed them all since he left.

Second: A fucking witch? It was as if they had known from the beginning that he wasn´t a werewolf and only used it as an excuse to make sure he got the address. Which lead him to believe that the witch had been behind it rather than the werewolf pack. He was not going to deal with this shit. No fucking way.

He left Chicago that night. Driving for 5 hours straight until he reached to outskirts of Detroit. After eating a really awful sandwich (by now he forced himself to eat at least once a day), he settled in his Jeep with his sleeping bag to sleep. That night there were no nightmares. For once he slept like a log. Unfortunately, the DPD checked his car in the morning.

He awoke to knocking on his window. Outside he could see two officers waiting patiently for him to let the window down. He rubbed his eyes and did as much, asking:

‘Good Morning Officers. Can I help you with something?’

The younger one flashed his eyes. Stiles groaned internally. Even more fucking werewolves.

‘Young man. Can I have your papers please.’

Having no real choice Stiles handed the older one his forged papers. Of course his heart was racing in his chest. Why were there werewolves everywhere?

‘They seem real enough. Good choice. Here. ‘

The officer handed them back. Stiles stared at him in disbelieve before he caught himself.

‘Thank you.’

 The younger one looked at him sharply. 

‘The witch isn´t going to wait forever boy. If I were you, I´d be quick to get my ass back there.’

The older officer nodded. Then they left, leaving Stiles with a feeling of dread. How was that possible? He could feel the panic building up in him. Was he still dreaming? He tried to count his fingers. But couldn’t count them. He tried to calm down. It wasn’t working. He was breathing too fast and it was too shallow for the Oxygen to reach his lungs.

All the things that he felt guilty about, he couldn´t stop thinking about them. Allison. Donovan. His dad. Scott. Malia. Liam. Everyone he hadn´t saved. Everyone he had left behind. His chest hurt and his heart pounded so loud it was the only thing he could hear. It was all his fault and he knew it. He feared what that witch might want from him. He wanted to breathe evenly but it didn´t work.

He felt so very sick. In the end he just stumbled out of his car and threw up all the nothing that was in his stomach. It hurt but the pain helped him focus. After 20 minutes he was calm enough to count his fingers. Ten. Ten of them. He was awake. Which meant he had really been summoned by a witch in another city after only half a fucking day of fleeing. This witch was obviously not to be messed with.

Of course he contemplated not going to the witch. Which resulted in him having goosebumps. So he drove back to Chicago fully knowing it was fucking stupid. Well best case scenario he would learn something about magic, worst case... let´s not think about that.

After he arrived in Chicago he decided to eat something first. Not just any something. His favorite something. Curly Fries. Because fuck it . If he was going to die at the hand of some really creepy witch, after abandoning his friends and father and all his problems, he wanted to taste the divine food that was curly fries one last time before descending to hell.

So he found himself a cheap diner and after sitting down at an empty booth, he ordered himself his fries. Stiles ate them slowly. Savoring the taste. He really didn´t want to go there.

‘Sup´Stiles?’

Looking up up he realized three things.

First: A young handsome man, roughly 10 years older than him with the fluffiest silver hair he´d ever seen sat opposite him. Ok, no not just fluffy. It was defying gravity. And it was a bit curly. He was completely speechless.

Second: He didn´t know Jack Frost (the eye color was strange too, some sort of violet-gold mix) over there so why would this person know his name. He was sure he would at least remember the fucking hair.

Third: Nobody noticed the tiny fucking dragon on the man’s shoulders that (if he wasn´t imagining things) was breathing fire towards the waitress. This he would have remembered, too.

‘You´re the witch aren´t you?’ He said defeated.

He should have expected as much. Well no, actually not because he had thought this dickhead would at least allow him to eat in peace.

‘Yes, I am. But please call me Alastair. I’m sorry by the way for being so impatient. I knew you´d come to me eventually but I really couldn’t wait to meet you.’

Stiles wanted to punch him. The dragon watched him as if he knew so he decided against it. Being on fire wasn´t on his “to do”-list.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I tried  
> And I tried my best  
> But I´m jackshit at programming so here is our urls because I´m that bad that I couldn´t even get an already coded thingy sunny researched for me to work properly
> 
> Sunny:http://fangirl-oracle.tumblr.com/
> 
> Devil: http://random-devil.tumblr.com/


	2. Always knew that I would find you here...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey people,  
> nice that you´re tuning in to tonight´s drunk updating  
> Don´t get me wrong it is only now that I´m uploading the chapter that I´ve drunk a few cocktails (not quite drunk but missspelling stuff a lot)  
> So this one, as well as number 3 are a bit short in comparison to chap 1. But fear not the ones after that (at least as far as I´m planning) are getting longer.  
> If someone want´s to know what Holly looks like, i made a quick sketch 3 days ago and uploaded it on my sidetumblr. https://www.tumblr.com/blog/random-devil
> 
> The title to this chapter is "Always knew that I would find you here" which is another verse from tragedy time  
> All I listen to is basically rise against, so there is a great chance I just stick to their songs for chapter names.
> 
> I don´t own teen wolf obviously but since this is not commercial i don´t even get the reason why people state all the time the don´t have any rights to the story... well fine that´s that... I hope you enjoy SunnyFeeling´s and my effort. Not only because editing nearly ended in war...

 

**October the 25th, 2013**

 

‘Sooo, how do you know my name?’

Alastair laughed. It was a nice sound. Warm and friendly. It made Stiles like him more, not enough though to completely remove the urge to punch the guy*.

‘I´m a witch of many talents. I had a dream you’d come needing my help. I didn´t know why or when but I contacted Caesar to look out for you.’

Stiles stared at him. Dreaming of future events. Nice. If he had been able to dream of future events maybe he could have saved Allison …who was he kidding. A lot of people could have been saved.

‘So you´ve told your Werewolf friend Caesar, and now I really hope you are aware of all the bad jokes this name makes possible, to look out for a kid that smelled vaguely of werewolf and looked like shit?’

Alastair bit his lip trying not to laugh and after failing miserably he looked down and muttered:

‘I´m afraid, that were my exact words. Sorry, Stiles.’

Now Stiles was the one who couldn´t hold his laughter back then.

‘This is ridiculous, you know? When I tell Scott he´ll...’

Remembering what he´d done made him stop abruptly. Yeah Stiles, what would Scott do? Since leaving them behind a month ago, he wasn´t even sure they were all still alive. He felt a familiar feeling of hurt, guilt and anxiety rising inside his stomach. Breathing slowly in and out, he willed his head to stay clear of negative thoughts. In and Out. In and Out. Slowly he calmed down, opening his eyes. It was then that he realized, Alastair had observed him the whole time. The dragon was no longer on Alastair´s shoulders but instead curled up in Stiles lap. Alastair smiled gently.

‘It seems Holly has taken a liking to you. She felt your discomfort and wanted to help. You know, baby dragons don´t know about a lot of things. But they´re good at consoling people or creatures they like.’

He rubbed his hands looking at Stiles, smiling brightly before clapping them together.

‘Let´s talk about business. I know you need a place to stay and a job. I want to have an apprentice again. I really want to help you. You seem to have magic. So I´m inclined to offer you a bed, a job and the chance to learn everything about magic. Well at least everything I know, which will probably take a while.’

‘What´s the catch?’

There is always a catch, but he declined he would have to continue wandering around aimlessly. He had done enough of that before he had settled for Chicago. He wouldn’t call it fun.

‘ You´ll work at my shop but you won´t earn a fortune, you can do that when you start your own business. Oh and I should probably mention my daughter Ivaine is living with me, at least when she´s not with Aurelia. She can be difficult at times, but it´s nice to have her around. But don´t worry, your rooms will be off limits for us if you don´t want us there.’

Stiles could deal with a child. What he couldn´t deal with was the crippling feeling of unworthiness. He didn´t deserve something like that. It was too good to be true or at least too good for him. It also basically screamed trap. But he couldn’t resist. And strangely enough his instincts told him that Alastair was a good guy.

‘Really? That´s all??? I thought you´d keep me as sex slave or a maid or a sex slave maid. Maybe make me pay really high fees for letting me study magic or I don´t know … send me to China to work in a shoe factory. I´m awful at making shoes.’

Alastair choked on a really loud laugh. The people around them hadn´t even spared them so much as a second glance before but now that Alastair laughed like crazy, people started noticing them. Once they noticed him they started pointing. Especially at the hair. Stiles coughed to get Alastair´s attention.

‘Listen. It´s not like I don´t need all the help you´re offering or that I´m not very grateful. But hell, why would you do that? And moreover for a complete stranger?’

Alastair smiled warmly at him. Suddenly people were minding their own business again.

‘Stiles. I did tell you about my dream.

Stiles nodded.

‘Good, because not only did I dream about you arriving here, I also dreamt about you becoming my apprentice. You know, these dreams sort of always come to pass. Trust me I´ve tried to change the future. Many times.’

If Stiles hadn´t been used to deciphering Sourwolf´s expressions he would have missed the look of defeat and pain that briefly appeared Alastair´s face. Holly seemed to have felt it too, because she returned to Alastair and curled around his neck.

‘The point is you don´t get the chance to change the future very often. Even if it works, it only results in tears and misery. I only want to help. If someone hadn´t helped me when I was in need, I wouldn´t have made it. I want to even the score by helping the next generation. You know?’

Suddenly Alastair’s eyes lit up with mischief.

‘There is a catch now that I think about it..’

Stiles groaned.

‘From this day on Holly will be your responsibility. ‘

As Stiles eyes widened with disbelieve Alastair chuckled.

‘Don´t worry. I won´t let you kill her by mistake. It´s fairly easy to tend to a dragon. They eat about everything. If you give her some of your fries she´ll never leave your side again. Like ever.’

This made Stiles realize, he had let his curly fries turn completely cold before eating even one of them. After Alastair untangled Holly from his neck and gave her to him, she instantly wrapped herself around Stiles shoulders.

‘Come on try it. Feed her Stiles. She´s been complaining about being hungry since she hatched this morning.’

While Alastair was talking Holly reheated the fries. Dragon Style. Stiles was so fascinated by her fire breathing, he had to do a double take when he heard the last of what Alastair had just said.

‘This morning? As in today??? Are you insane to trust me with a hatchling? Do you know what I did before I came here? How many people died just because of me? I´m bad luck to the people around me! I can´t even care for myself – I mean look at me! I´m a fucking wreck!’

Holly started chirping distressed. Stiles immediately stopped ranting and caressed her head. He didn’t want to scare her. She was so tiny and innocent. Little Baby Dragon Holly. Of course by now he had to admit that he was already in love with her beautiful blue and pink scales and her tiny wings. Out of the corner of his eyes he saw Alastair smiling at him. It was a proud-father-smile. Stiles decided to let him have his way. He couldn´t win against both their pleading puppy stares. They were even worse than Isaac so he gave up on this argument.

‘How big will she become?’

Alastair shrugged.

‘That depends.’

Stiles shot him a dirty look.

‘On what?’

The question made Alastair look weary. He seemed like a very old man now. Broken. At first Stiles didn´t know what to think of this. Belatedly he realized that maybe this man´s past was also filled with wounds. Many of them. Lurking in every corner. He felt a bit sorry for asking.

‘On what you need her to do. If she´ll have to fight for you she´ll get big. If she´s to help you with your studies, she´ll stay rather small. Grown up she could grow as small as a cat or as big as an elephants.’

‘I won´t let her fight.’

Although the smile Alastair gave him was genuine, it was filled with enough bitterness to tell Stiles, this man had lost someone’s life to fighting. Maybe they weren´t so different after all.

‘It´s not your decision. She´ll feel what you really need most in your life and react to that.’

That didn´t sound so bad. He was pretty sure he´d not need a fighting dragon.

‘Why didn´t you feed her when she hatched this morning?’

He wasn´t even graced with an answer only raised eyebrows that screamed ‘Come on Stiles you know exactly why I couldn´t do that’. Well Alastair was right. Stiles knew why, but he was not going to go back to eyebrow conversation. There was one person who was allowed to speak eyebrows with him. And it wasn´t Alastair.

‘She was the reason I should “be quick to get my ass back here”, wasn´t she? You said I should feed her, then she would never leave my side. I´m guessing it is probably some kind of imprinting thingy or something… I don´t know, you know?’

‘Yes. After dragons hatch the first person to feed becomes their surrogate parent. Usually they imprint on a dragon which tends to be the best to happen. Wild dragons usually keep to themselves. The rarely bother people… Well, I found her egg 7 weeks ago. It was only by chance. Her mother had been killed by rogue hunters for scales and talons. There are not many dragons left in the world. ‘

Stiles let the heavy weight of responsibility settle on his shoulders. This was nothing like anything he had planned . ‘You had anything planned?’ asked an inner voice. Fine. Okay. There had been no plans. But he couldn´t take care of a dragon, could he? Holly caught his gaze as it shifted around nervously. She probably felt his nervousness.

‘Why would you give her to me?’

Smiled softly again, Alastair answered: .

‘She needs someone to take care of her. You might have figured that she likes you better. Besides, you need her more than anyone I can think of. Don´t worry too much Stiles. It won’t be much different from a dog. Actually it´s easier because dragons are very intelligent.’

Stiles sighed and fed Holly a curly fry. Shouldn´t have done it in retrospect. Holly developed a taste for curly fries that night. For anything fried for that matter. He would never get the chance to eat his fries alone again. Greedy little dragon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * Means that this divine sentence was written by SunnyFeeling alone (and I was rather jealous that I didn´t think of it)
> 
> for anyone who wonders how big Holly is supposed to be -> slightly smaller than a bunny ,as big as a few days old kitten.


	3. ... in a puddle of the bravest tears

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I don´t own TeenWolf - suprise -.- so much wow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By now you know the drill - still the same song - tragedy time, still the same beta - SunnyFeeling and still the same struggle while beta-ing.
> 
> This chapter is from john´s pov and thats about everything you need to know about it.
> 
> In my story john is NOT sure who injured him (but it´s theo of course)
> 
> Have fun and now I´m going to sleep because its 7.41 am and I need to go to college later today  
> lots of love and thank you for your comments
> 
> Little Devil

**October the 2nd, 2013**

The Day after Stiles left

 

John Stilinski sat in his hospital bed. Waiting for news. After he had been taken to the hospital they had operated on him. He awoke around noon the next day. To his disappointment Stiles wasn´t there. He asked a nurse, if his son had been there earlier, but she only shook her head and said that she hadn´t seen anyone yet. Upon checking the clipboard she told him that Stiles had already been informed on John´s condition. After that he tried all day to ignore the feeling of anger and hurt that was growing with every passing hour without Stiles showing. At least all his deputies showed up.

When he woke up the next morning Scott sat in his room.

‘Stiles is missing.’

Scott shifted uncomfortable. He looked as if he had just killed a man.

‘For how long has Stiles been missing?’

John thought about the hurt in Stiles eyes when he had confronted him.

‘Nobody has seen him for two days. We are unable to find a track, it has rained too much the last few days. When I tried to contact him yesterday he didn´t answer. So I dropped by your house today. He hasn´t been at home for two days. And he still doesn’t answer his phone. I´m scared the dread doctors might have taken him.’

A shiver went up and down John´s spine. The thought of his son being tortured was unbearable.

‘Scott, you need to find him.’

Scott must have seen the pain in his eyes because sat next to John and briefly hugged him.

‘I will find him John, I promise. I need to apologize. I thought Theo said the truth about Stiles beating Donovan to death, but now I´m not so sure anymore. Theo lied about a lot of things. He was helping the dread doctors all along.’

Stiles had told him, that there had been no other way. But maybe it had been self-defense. The kid felt guilty for nearly everything. He´d seen the look on Donovan´s face, that kid had murder in his eyes. Maybe he had attacked Stiles.

‘Theo told me about Donovan just before I got injured. His version of the story at least. When I tried to talk to Stiles he just… It was just… Everything hurt and I wanted to know if my son was a murderer.’

He steadied his gaze and looked into Scott´s eyes. Grim expression on his face.

‘Scott, you need to find that asshole. Get him to tell you where Stiles is. Make sure he won´t mess with us again. Make sure we won´t have to deal with him ever again. Save Stiles! And Scott… convince your mother to get me released by the end of the day. I can´t stay in this bed while my son is in danger.’

Scott nodded and left. John could only will his injuries to heal faster. He would find his son.

 

**October the 13th, 2013**

About two weeks later John sat in his office. He rubbed his temples. Theo claimed, he had nothing to do with it. Instead he promised them to help them fight against the dread doctors. He only wanted to save his own ass and the asses of his new “pack”. Including Donovan who was NOT dead, well not anymore. They were only a bunch of undead teenage experiments. Scott sided with them nonetheless after declaring something about second chances. Donovan had even told them during a meeting what had happened with Stiles. John had felt awful after the reveal that their assumptions were right, but the look on Scotts face had been utter despair.

Defeating the dread doctors had been arduous. They didn´t have Stiles. Before they were destroyed, the last of them had only uttered that ‘the sorcerer’ would have been of no use to them. Lydia promised she hadn´t felt his death which was only a small relieve. However Lydia nearly getting killed on the next day by the beast of Gevaudan didn´t help at all. She was severely wounded physically as well as psychologically and they couldn´t bring her to the hospital because of the nature of her injuries. Fortunately the hidden section of the Eichenhouse had what she needed or so they had been told by Deaton. Poor Parrish felt responsible for it and convinced her mother, who now finally admitted to knowing more than she had let on, that he should pay for the hospital bills. Now all they could do was to continue their search and hope for the best.

They had checked Stiles bank account but it hadn´t really given them any clues. He had emptied his bank account shortly after the sheriff had been hospitalized. It had only been 75 $ which had probably been for buying a bus ticket. However when they had checked the footage of the bus station, Stiles was nowhere to be seen. Nobody remembered seeing Stiles buying a ticket or getting a cab. Stiles´ old Jeep was still in repair. It was as if he had vanished into thin air. They had tried to contact Derek but he had no knowledge about Stiles` whereabouts. However Derek had promised to call when he got news.

No matter how hard they tried to find Stiles, his only son remained missing.

He reached his 4th cup coffee that day. Stiles would have reprimanded him, declaring something along the lines of too much coffee being unhealthy. But Stiles wasn´t here and if he couldn´t drink whiskey, he´d at least drink coffee.

Just as he went to take a sip Deputy Parrish knocked.

‘Sheriff, there is a call on the helpline for missing teenagers.’

He nodded, Parrish walked back to his desk and put the call though. He picked up, hoping this would somehow help them.

‘Sheriff Stilinski speaking. What can I do for?’

‘Sheriff this is Amanda Nunez from the Bank of California, Beacon Hills department. I have information concerning your missing son.’

John put the coffee back on the table and grabbed a pen.

‘Your son came to the Bank three weeks ago. He gave me a paper with your signature on it allowing him to withdraw 5,000 $ from his college fund. Considering this happened on the day your son disappeared I thought this might be relevant information.’

‘Why haven´t you contacted us earlier?’

‘I´m sorry I just came back from my grandmother´s funeral in Mexico. I´ve only been informed about it this morning.’

‘Thank you for calling. I appreciate it. ’

He couldn´t appreciate it. This meant his son had left by his own choice just after John had confronted him with killing Donovan. Numb with pain he called Scott.

‘He ran away, Scott.’

‘What?’

‘Stiles. Stiles ran away.’

‘No, this can´t be?!’

‘He ran away. He took 5,000 $ from his college fund and left.’

\-----—

**October the 15th, 2013**

 

His interview with a national television channel regarding the many unsolved murders and abductions in his town went well. There was a picture of Stiles amongst the missing children. Usually John avoided tv-interviews. Stiles would know he had only accepted to send him a message.

Some people called afterwards, telling him they had seen Stiles in San Francisco, Denver City, Kansas City, Chicago and Detroit. If these people weren´t lying, Stiles seemingly wanted to get as far away as possible. The last call concerning Stiles´ whereabouts came in a week after the interview, placing Stiles in a small city near Detroit. The whole pack wanted to search for Stiles. They had even called Derek who had told them he was in Toronto, barely 4 hours away. Derek told John on the next day he had a fresh track which he had followed to Chicago. He declined any help and the pack understood. None of them were wanted nor needed. They had failed to see Stiles struggle. None of them had realized how much he had blamed himself. Even Malia, who had known about Donovan, had blown it. Derek promised them to keep them posted. The first thing he planned to do was to contact the local alpha for help.

John figured he´d see him again if Stiles felt ready to come back. His son was a smart kid. He´d even elude werewolves if he wanted to.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> look who screwed up the updating! ME! sorry for the short time where there were absolutely no functioning paragraphs  
> but thats fixed now which is nice and makes at least me happy


	4. This isn´t giving up, no this is letting go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally it is here, after hours of editing and changing stuff! Thanks to the lovely but fierce SunnyFeeling ;) I know you´re sitting next to me at the moment xD  
> Fortunately there wasn´t much to edit in chaps 2 and 3 so now I present to you chapter four, where we´ll learn about the hidden qualities of tomatoes. If someone wants to know the other plants powers- just ask.
> 
> Title is a song by rise against (this is letting go)  
> teen wolf is still not owned by me (bummer)  
> I´m feeling still sick (but I´ve managed to pass on my cold to a few people :D yay )#
> 
> Have fun with this !

**October the 25th, 2013**

Stiles had followed Alastair to his home. He didn´t expect anything particular when he pulled onto the estate but certainly not a brand new Mercedes. Or a beautiful Victorian stiled 3 story building surrounded by a lush green garden with a pavilion and a goddamn fountain. A FOUNTAIN. The asshole was fucking rich. Only his great strength of will prevented him from commenting on the fountain. He was rather proud of himself.

‘Soo Stiles, welcome to my humble home.’

Stiles snorted. And in good old sourwolf-fashion he raised an eyebrow.

‘Okay maybe not so humble. But you have to realize that it´s easy to make a ridiculous amount of money each year with skills. You wouldn´t believe how much people are willing to pay me for charms and potions, or removing curses from their firstborns.’

Stiles only chuckled in reply. This guy was obviously competent possibly more so then Deaton. Like a lot.

After Stiles got his duffel bag out of the car, Alastair gave him a tour of the house. The ground floor consisted of a big kitchen and eating area, the living room, Alastair´s workshop and library, two bathrooms and a business room.

‘You´ll spend many hours down in my workshop. I believe in learning by doing. Although maybe you should start by learning about the basics. ‘

He pointed to the back door.

‘Through there is where most my alchemical ingredients grow. You´ll be able to explore later though, right now I´m going to show you the rest of the house.’

He ushered Stiles up the stairs to the first floor, where his and Ivaine´s as well as two guest rooms were located. Upon being led into Alastair’s room Stiles inhaled sharply. He saw what appeared to be Van Gogh's, Rubens, Da Vinci's, Friedrich's and other paintings to be hanging on the walls. This wasn´t a bedroom it was a freaking museum. There was a fireplace and the bookshelf was packed with ancient leather volumes.

‘Modest’, Stiles muttered under his breath.

‘Modest my ass.’

Judging by the big fat grin on Alastair’s face he´d heard the comment.

The third floor contained even more paintings, a few potted plants, a hobby room with a grand piano in one corner and a huge table with comfortable looking chairs in the other, -

‘For poker mainly. You´ll meet those dirty cheaters. They have never played honest, but neither have I.’

\- A spacey roof terrace and finally Stiles´ room.

It was bigger than his room in Beacon Hills. There were drapes on each side of the windows and terrace door. At the walls he had a few shelves, most of which were empty save a few books in the one nearest to his bed. There was a dressing room right next to the on suite bathroom and he even had a massive desk with a matching chair. Finally he turned to look at the bed which seemed to have materialized right out of his dreams.

‘Do you like your room?’

‘Thank you. I – I just...yes. Thanks.’

Stiles was unsure what to say. This place was beautiful and he absolutely loved the house. At loss of words he turned around and hugged Alastair. No there were no tears in his eyes. After he let go, Alastair stepped bag and nodded.

‘Well I’ll leave you alone for now. Dinner is around 7.30pm probably? Tell me if you want to cook and I´ll show you where the useful stuff is. And the greenhouse if you haven´t found it yourself by then. I´ll take Holly with me. She needs some water and maybe a bit food. You can pick her up in the workshop when you´re done unpacking.’

‘Yes, yes thank you I´ll do that.’

And for the first time in a month Stiles smiled because he was a little bit happy. He untangled Holly from himself and nudged her towards Alastair. She didn´t seem to mind.

‘See you then.’

‘Yeah.’

Suddenly, Stiles was alone again. Everything came back at once. His betrayal, his father’s disappointment, Scott´s distrust, Donovan’s murder, Derek’s depart and Allison’s death. He stumbled over to the bed. It was all somehow his fault. Starting with Scott getting bitten, because of him.

‘I don´t deserve this.’

He sank down on the soft covers which were exactly as soft as he had imagined them and the tears flowed freely. Sobbing and cursing himself, his loose mouth and all the decision he ever made. For half an hour he lay there before the control over his emotions returned to him.

When he finally stood up again to unpack his bag his sleeve was wet from wiping the tears away. Slowly he walked into the bathroom to check on his appearance. Stiles eyes still shone red from crying, his lips were chapped and he looked pale, almost ill. Frowning he splashed water in his face a few times.

Muttering under his breath he turned around to unpack. It took him about 15 minutes to be done. By then it was already 05.00 pm. In a hurry he went downstairs to the workshop.

‘Aaah wonderful, I just wondered when you´d come down. There is something I wanted to show you.’

Before Stiles could reply anything Holly collided with his face and dug her claws into his hair and jaw in order to not fall down. Very careful, because fuck those talons hurt, he made a tentative attempt to peel her of his face. While doing so he murmured comfortingly.

‘Holly it´s ok, I´m here. You can let go now. I´m not going to leave but please let go of my face. It´s hideous enough as it is, and I already have enough scars, Holly. Let go.’

Very gently Holly let go of his poor face. After that she looked at him with big sorry eyes and whined faintly as she licked the red marks she had caused. Then she settled on his left shoulder.

Stiles sighed heavily and stroked her back before turning to Alastair.

‘What did you want to show me?’

Alastair put his hand on a big leather book on his desk. He opened it on the first page which was empty.

‘This book is a magical diary of some sorts. Well not diary but more of a study book. It´s empty at the moment because I just finished the charms. It´s perfect for learning, because the magic I wove into the pages will help you remember everything you write down in it. It’s a welcome present for my new apprentice. I hope you will find it helpful during your studies.’

Stiles he smiled and thanked Alastair despite the fact never forgetting anything useful anyways. Eventually he snatched the book from the table to take it back to his room.

‘If you don´t mind I´ll just take it upstairs.’

‘No, wait a second.’

With a flick of his hand Alastair let the book disappear. A grin spread over his face.

‘Now you won’t have to walk upstairs again. Have fun exploring the grounds.’

‘It must be awfully easy for you to keep your house in order. All the possibilities. Not having to get up during movie marathons to get ice cream or a new drink out of the fridge.’

Grinning from one ear to the other Alastair nodded.

Thinking of quite a number of other possible uses he exited the house through the front door. To his left were the pavilion and the fountain. Trees were hiding the estate from the street and from where he was standing, he couldn´t even see the garage. To his right there were mainly flowers so he decided to round the house anticlockwise, starting at the pavilion.

It was a beautiful white structure, strongly influenced by Greek temples judging by the Corinthian columns the roof was residing on. From the pavilion he walked towards the fountain which wasn´t abundantly awe-inspiring, unless it contained the water of youth, so he walked on.

Behind the trees he discovered a massive greenhouse and behind that a field with vegetables. There were carrots, potatoes, beans, salad, zucchinis, pumpkins, eggplants, peppers and cucumbers. Opening the greenhouse he came upon tomatoes, strawberries, a blueberry bush and a whole bunch of herbs and flowers that Stiles didn´t know. If he had to guess he´d say they were alchemistic ingredients. He vowed to learn all their hidden qualities. He plucked a small ripe tomato and handed it Holly for safekeeping, but she ate it before he could say anything.

Back outside he continued his tour around the house only to find a little pond not far from the workshop backdoor. There were fishes inside the water, the color of rainbows. He could see shiny crystals in the depth of the ponds unnaturally clear water. It was mesmerizing. Stiles stood there for a while before he moving on.

The rest of his tour was rather boring. There were a few pots with herbs for cooking in front of the kitchen door and that was basically it.

Stiles went back inside and into the kitchen, where he poured himself a glass of water and filled what seemed to be Hollys bowl with milk from the fridge. On that occasion he checked its contents to determine what meal would be possible to prepare. As it turned out, Alastair`s fridge was filled to the brim with a wild mix of stuff Stiles wouldn´t eat even if someone held a gun to his head and few possibly edible things. Stiles could only feel sorry for little Ivaine.

He decided **he** would cook spaghetti with tomato sauce. Having made that decision he sauntered towards the workshop to inform Alastair.

‘Alastair? I´m cooking dinner from now on. I´m afraid we have to talk about the fridge situation. If you want I would even sell my Jeep and get you a second fridge for your magical stuff, but this is intolerable and needs to change.’

The amused look Stiles received made him realize how impolite he´d just been after all that Alastair had done for him.

‘Feeling right at home, huh? Good. You´re right of course. Ivaine always complains about the fridge, too. But I usually ignore her whining because, well, she´s my little daughter and does a lot of complaining.  I´m just going to create a pocket universe tomorrow so don´t worry.

Stiles felt relieved at that. He thought he might have overstepped his boundaries, but that was seemingly not the case.

‘Ok I thought we could eat Spaghetti with tomato sauce. You okay with that?’

‘Yes that would be nice. It´s been a while actually. Make sure to use a few tomatoes from the greenhouse. They enhance magical abilities as well as reveal your strongest trait, which is why we´ll eat them today.’

Stiles found it absolutely funny that a witch would grow such vegetables. He imagined Alastair selling them to people who were trying to find out if and what magic they had. Then he realized something.

‘Holly just ate a small one.’

‘She´s a dragon. She doesn´t count. This is about humanoid magic. Dragons have a very different kind of magic. For Holly they are just regular tomatoes. Just like the other vegetables don’t affect her. So now come I´ll show you were the tools are. I´ll help you if you want.’

Picking up Holly who just came from the kitchen Stiles followed Alastair back there. He´d certainly be careful with these vegetables now.

________________________________________________

 

After they were done with cooking they sat down in the eating area of the kitchen. Holly had her own little plate and by the sound of it she found her spaghetti delicious. Stiles had taken a few bites when he couldn´t see his hands anymore.

‘Alastair?’

He was ready to panic any second.

‘Yes, Stiles?’

Then he looked up. If Stiles wasn´t so shocked about it he might have laughed at Alastair´s face.

‘Holy Shit! That was fast… and strong. I don´t think anyone has ever reacted that strongly to my tomatoes… Even your clothes are beginning to vanish.’

And sure enough when Stiles looked down his T-shirt was already see trough. Looking down, he started to see the chair he was sitting on.

‘Alastair?!’

‘Illusion. That’s your strong suit, ok? I have no idea how to turn it off though… Maybe you should announce yourself once you come into rooms from now on?’

Stiles snorted. No. He´d scare the shit out of people now. Starting with the neighbors.

‘I better be visible again by tomorrow. We need to go grocery shopping. And if I´m not visible, well you´ll need to think of something. We need more edible stuff in your house. And I´m not letting you go shopping by yourself.’

Alastair only chuckled at his remark, but after a while he nodded. They ate the rest of their food in companionable silence. After that Alastair put the dishes into the dishwasher and shooed Stiles and Holly upstairs, wishing them a good night. So Stiles went upstairs, dragon cradled to his chest and got ready for bed. Which meant he undressed and for the first time in many days brushed his teeth. After that he even took a shower, which was an adventure on its own, especially since a certain little dragon refused to stay out of the cabin.

Then came the moment when he got into bed and turned off the light. Holly was gently glowing. Pink. A pink glowing dragon was resting on his still invisible chest, while he was lying safe and sound in a soft bed in a stranger’s house after eating Spaghetti Neapolitan. His friends might be out there searching for him or worse they were already dead because of whatever the dread doctors had done. And just like that every emotion that he had tried to suppress for the last 3 hours was back. Shame, guilt, terror, uncertainty, misery.

Shaking violently his breathing got irregular until he was only seconds away from hyperventilating. All the images that haunted him were swirling around in his head.

Allison. Dead on the pavement. Blood spreading all over the ground. Scott’s hands stained with her blood as she told him it was ok. All of it through the eyes of the Nogitsune with which he still had had a connection at that time. All the people who had been hurt because he had been too weak to resist the Nogitsune, to cast it out of his head, or better yet not even let it in in the first place.

How he hadn´t been able to figure things out in time and had nearly gotten Scott killed. How he hadn´t prevented Derek from accompanying them to Mexico and nearly got him killed in the process. How he was utterly useless in the fight against the benefactor.

How his friends slowly forgot all about him and stopped caring. Even Malia. They hadn´t noticed it yet but they weren´t turning to him for information or his theories anymore. It was as if they didn´t trust him enough any longer or were too preoccupied with other things to care.

This thought of course didn´t help. If they didn´t need him what was his purpose? He killed Donovan. He had been an idiot for sure but didn´t he deserve to die.

Shortly after that his breath hitched again and he started wheezing. The oxygen didn´t reach his lungs anymore and just as he desperately gasped for air already accepting that he was going to pass out Holly gave a chirping sound and gently licked his chin.

Mesmerized he watched he pink glowing scales, forgetting about his panic attack. His breathing evened out and his shivering receded as he watched her luminous scales. She for her part squirmed in his hands until he let go of her. Then she nuzzled into the crook of his neck. It had a very calming effect. Afraid he might lose his calm again he settled for sleep as fast as he could with Holly still lying on his chest. Even though her presence helped him a lot, the general feeling of dread and guilt that haunted him ever since his mother’s death stayed.

He still had nightmares that woke him during the night. The first time Alastair came bursting into his room, hands bristling with magic until he realized there was no real threat.

‘I´m afraid, I can´t give you a sleeping potion… It would help keep the nightmares at bay, but neither do I have a useful one in store, nor do I have the required ingredients. If you want to, I can get you an appointment with a supernatural therapist in no time, it helps you know, to talk to someone who knows what’s up in this crazy world... I went there more often than a person should ever have to and it helped. But I´m not knowledgeable enough in the therapeutic field to help you with your demons. Only with actual demons, but I´m afraid that isn´t the case here…’

He pat Stiles shoulder and then left him alone. Well not alone. With Holly. Holly who had been there the whole time cuddling him and offering comfort.

`Good Night, Holly.’


	5. To whereabouts unknown, please know you can come home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I´m sorry it took me so loooong I mean it´s been a month and I thought it was going to be a matter of a week  
> I may have been totally obsessed with star wars for a while ( 2 weeks) and after that I have no excuse except that life came between me and updating, I´m very sorry about this  
> But this story will not be abandoned. I swear on my collection of fandom merch. Sunnyfeeling and her sister are my judges and executioners

**October the 25th, 2013**

Derek found Stiles´ smell fairly easy. He didn´t smell nice though, not like he remembered him. He smelled dirty and sick. It simply made Derek worry. He also found the (wolf) cops that Stiles must have met earlier that day. They were nice enough to tell him they had sent him back to Chicago. It was then that Derek started suspecting something strange was going on but he figured he´d just roll with it for the moment. This wasn´t going to beat the Kanima incident.

Derek had decided to help looking for Stiles just 2 days earlier and left his new place in Toronto to join the search. After he followed the track to Chicago he realized he had to call the Sheriff. It was clear that the man was anxious to find his son.

John was happy to hear from Derek, but Derek found it unfair to give them hope yet when really all he had discovered was a small diner in which Stiles´ trail ended.

‘Sheriff, listen. I´ll call when I´ve found him. First I´ll have to call on the local pack, let the alpha know I´m here, what I´m trying to archive and that I´m definitely not trying to challenge him or something. I promise to call again if I´m to find something. Maybe some of the other wolves are willing to help me search for him.’

Derek listened to the Sheriff proposing on sending the pack to Chicago.

‘No, don´t let them swarm the city, Stiles might find out they´re here and run away before someone has talked to him. Keep them in Beacon Hills. The desert wolf will eventually come to you and Malia needs to be protected. I don´t want any more people to die. It´s bad enough what happened to Lydia. Try to keep them save Sheriff – I´ll concentrate on finding Stiles.’

‘Yes. Good luck to you, too. Goodbye Sheriff.’

_____________________________________________

It was not THAT hard to find a local wolf. Their smell was everywhere. It was rather hard to pin them down though. Through the constant stench of the city he managed to find a fresh trace around noon the next day. When he finally made contact the other wolf looked nervous.

‘What do you want?’

‘I want to see your Alpha. I have a request I want to talk about.’

The woman looked at him curiously.

‘I remember you. You´re Derek Hale. Our packs used to be allies. I´m Lynette Johnson of the Greywolf-Clan. You probably don´t remember me… It´s been a long time.’

Derek concentrated on her scent. He didn´t remember the smell but the stench of drugs that was surrounding her might have been distorting his senses. Her face however seemed vaguely familiar.

‘I don´t think I do.’

‘That is what I thought.’

She smiled and it unsettled him. There was an edge to it.

‘You want to meet my cousin. He is the alpha now. A True Alpha! Would you believe it? Well, nobody gave him the power, but he is an Alpha so the story must be true. He is having trouble at the moment with a ghoul or some hobgoblins. Might as well be a witch. You should talk to his sister she can make an appointment for you. You know, they don´t really like me around anymore because of the drugs. You must have smelled it. So I can´t help you but Aurelia can. She manages the pack-alliance from her coffee shop. We are over 120 wolves at this point. Can you believe it? She doesn´t even have to hope for real customers. Most of the pack-alliance pops in there once a week and there are some who are there practically all the time. Can you believe it? As if they had nothing better to do. But I digress I think. I do that quite often you know? My mother says I´ve done it even before I started with the drugs…’

Derek felt himself become very frustrated by now.

‘Please would you give me the address of the Coffee Shop?’

The woman seemed slightly startled, but she recovered quickly.

‘It´s called ‘The Dark Moon’ It´s opposite the Newberry Library. Can you believe it? She called it Dark Moon. Like we need the attention of those twilight hippies. It´s a nice Coffee Shop though, they have some good brews. I haven´t been there in a while, because you know…’

She kept on talking before she realized that Derek had left at the exact moment he had the information he needed. He remembered her now. Vividly. She had always been very talkative. In an annoying way. Not like Stiles. Stiles was funny when he rambled. Stiles was lovable. This woman was only an embarrassment.

______________________________________________________

Finding ‘The Dark Moon’ was difficult. He couldn´t follow the smell because there was none. Just like Stiles´ smell had simply vanished right inside the cheap diner where nobody had seen him apparently. Without doubt there was a magician somehow muddled into this.

 He sighed. If there was a magic-user involved everything was going to be a lot more challenging. Derek´s mind started to list all the reasons this was going to end badly. Sure magic, because they had had so many good experiences with magic. This was just awesome.

When he entered the Coffee Shop it finally struck him how bad an idea it was, to follow the leads of a high omega junkie (because let’s face it, they only tolerated her). Only then it was already too late to change anything about it because by the time the door closed behind him, every werewolf’s stare was fixed on him. There were only a few humans who most likely were part of the pack. No other customers. Just him. And fifteen other werewolves who looked at him as if he´d just burnt their teddy bears. Slowly without sudden movements he walked to the counter. This was a search and rescue mission, not a suicide mission. The woman behind the counter smiled at him with a smile that said: ‘Give me one reason to kill you.’ He felt nearly as welcomed as he had felt the first time back in Beacon Hills.

‘Hello, my name is Derek Hale. I´m here because a member of your pack, Lynette was her name, pointed me to this address. She said that the sister of the Alpha owns this shop and could help me get an appointment.’

Immediately the whole place relaxed, as if he suddenly wasn´t a threat anymore although he heard a few curse Lynette under their breaths. Most of the other wolves now seemed to mind their own businesses again but he knew they were listening.

‘Derek Hale? That name rings a bell. You wouldn´t be the Derek Hale, son of Thalia? We had good relations to your pack if I remember correctly.’

‘You do remember correctly and yes my mother was Thalia.’

That was the moment she seemed to remember his mother and nearly every other person present at the winter solstice summit had been killed by the fire. She looked down.

‘I´m sorry about your loss.’

He only nodded.

‘And you´re here to join the pack…?’

Smiling he shook his head.

‘No, I´m here to look for a member of my former pack. He is missing and since I was in the vicinity I told them I´d search for him. He is a human so we´re all a bit concerned.’

Derek could practically feel the sympathetic nods.

‘Caesar is not here at the moment as you can see. You could probably meet him tomorrow. I´ll just call him and tell you in a minute. I´m Aurelia by the way.’

Derek didn´t listen in to the call when she made her way to the back to phone her brother but even so he overheard the loud ‘No Ivaine! Hands off the cake. You know exactly that it is not for you’.

For a second he wondered who Ivaine was but then decided he didn´t care. If she was of any importance to his search he´d find out later. Now his meeting with Caesar was top priority. After maybe five minutes which he had spent staring gloomily into the distance, Aurelia came back with a smile on her face.

‘Good news. He´d like to meet you tomorrow. At the moment he is working on a, well a case, but he´ll call you as soon as he´s finished, which will likely be by tomorrow evening. Wait here for him tomorrow and all should be fine. I´m going to send a text message to the pack that they mustn´t worry about your presence here. I´ll be here just as every day and maybe we could figure out a plan to find your pack mate while we wait for Caesar to call or show up.’

Derek liked plans. And this particular plan sounded good. Nodding in approval he allowed himself to smile.

‘Sounds good.’

‘Awesome. Soooo now that you´re here would you like some coffee? Those losers don´t even pay for their coffee and I could use a real customer for a change.’

Said losers´ indignant protests made Derek laugh.

‘I´d like a cappuccino, thanks.’

___________________________________________________________________________

**October the 26th, 2013**

The next day when Derek was waiting in the Coffee Shop for any sign of Caesar he made friends with the local pack. They told him that (just as he had suspected) Lynette was more of an omega. He was also educated on the pros and cons of having such a huge pack.

The trick was that there were actually 7 Alphas who each had their own pack but had merged. The 7 Alphas formed some sort of council that made decisions together and had an elected president. At the moment Caesar was president- which may have been because he was a true Alpha- but his new friends we not quite sure. Although it seemed that Lester and Howell were best informed about everything concerning the pack there were some things even they didn´t know. Of course they were also not telling certain things but that was to be expected.

They had taken hold of him when he entered the Black Moon the next morning and insisted they show him the city. At first he had tried to decline but Aurelia had looked at him and told him with stern eyes she´d have his ass if he didn´t go and enjoy himself for a few hours.

Lester and Howell seriously dragged him to the pier to do a boat tour. It was fun but he would never admit it. The air was filled with salt and for once he could breathe freely. From the boat they pointed out the various interesting things the town had to offer. He would have relaxed if he hadn´t worried about the involvement of a magician and the fact that nobody had mentioned somebody like that yet.

By 4 pm they we´re back on their way to the coffee shop when Howell´s phone rang. He excused himself for a moment but that moment lasted only about 10 seconds.

‘The boss is injured. Dangerously wounded, she said.’

Howell shared a look with Lester and then glanced at Derek who nodded grimly. The meeting was postponed.

‘Lester, let´s get moving. Derek you better head back to your hotel. Wait there for us. We´ll contact you.’

‘See ya, Derek!’

With these words both of them fell into a jog and within seconds he lost sight of them. Groaning he walked back to his hotel stopping only once on the way to buy food. This was going to take longer than he had anticipated

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sunnyfeelings favorite quote is still and will probably always be: 'You are no werewolf.' *obi wan kenobi wave* (these are not the droids you´re looking for)
> 
> Also here is the Best of Stupid (things i actually wrote) for this chapter that were found before publishing:  
> Derek looked and smelled harder. ( Try to picture it )  
> He sighted. (instead of sighed)  
> ‘Derek Hale? There is a bell ringing. (Now imagine a kid sitting next to derek while aggressively shaking a bell)


	6. Forget all that you know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I´m so sorry it took me nearly half a year to update!!!
> 
> So there are parts in here that are not yet betad but SunnyFeeling and I will do that soon.  
> If you don´t understand what I menat due to unbetad midnight writing please tell me in the comments.  
> Again I´m very sorry it took so long! I promise I haven´t given up on this story  
> There was just a lot going on in my life the last few months.
> 
> Anywaays enjoy!!!

**October the 26th, 2013**

More nightmares followed, but none as bad as the first. He considered that a win. At 6.30 am he decided he might as well get up. It was already dawning. Holly lay curled beside his pillow and snored. It didn´t surprise him. She was barely two days old and in his limited experience sleep was essential for newborns. This might or might not include baby dragons, so didn´t wake her. Instead he put some clean clothes on and sat down on his bed asking himself what the fuck he was doing.

It took half an hour for Holly to realize her ‘mother’ wasn´t still sleeping next to her. Sensing Stiles in her vicinity and in a relatively calm state of mind she relaxed instantly. Shortly after waking she leaped towards him, trying to fly. Stiles made an effort to not laugh when she involuntarily went into a nosedive mid-jump and fell on his bed only centimeters from him. A grumpy noise escaped her throat but she recovered swiftly and climbed clothes until she sat on, what seemed to be her place now, his shoulder.

Now that Holly was awake he turned the light on and inspected his books. He let his fingers glide over the leathery spines. ‘Potions – The Basics’, ‘Alchemy for Beginners’, ’The Six Schools of Magic’, ‘How to incapacitate your Opponent without killing them’ and a few more where lined up on a shelf. He snatched ‘The Six Schools of Magic’ from its place and brought it over to the bed to have a proper look at it.

When he opened the book a little cloud of dust emanated into the air. Holly sneezed and a little burst of smoke erupted from her nostrils.

‘Careful. I wanna read that which will be really difficult if you light it up like a bonfire.’

Holly only graced him with an eye-roll but changed her position enough so that she was laying on his back and the only thing in danger of catching fire would be his hair.

He read over the first page.

 

The Six Schools of Magic

 

Alteration

The art of altering the fabric of reality around you to an extent of changing the attributes of inanimate and living matter.

Sub techniques: Telekinesis, Metamorphosis, Experimental healing

 

Conjuration

The art of conjuring already existing Objects or Creatures.

Sub techniques: Necromancy, Demonology, Blood magic

 

Destruction

Any sort of destructive Magic that inflicts damage and injuries (body, mind or soul).

Sub techniques: Elemental Magic, Explosive Runes, Curses

 

Illusion

The art of manipulating the minds of lesser beings into believing whatever one wishes.

Sub techniques: Cloaking, Projection

 

Manipulation of Time and Space

The art of manipulation time and space within the rules of Merlin.

Sub techniques: Shadow-Transportation, Divination and Past vision

 

Restoration

The art of healing and protecting (White Magic).

Sub techniques: Good Luck Charms, Putting the dead to rest

 

He was particularly interested in Illusion, considering he was trapped in one right now. He read about the manifestations of illusion. About the possible spells and how there was a difference between projecting an illusion for everybody to see as opposed to placing an illusion in somebody´s mind. It was fascinating.

Him being invisible was the former which was way more difficult than the later. He also found out that objects could be charmed with a mixture of alteration and illusion to create illusions themselves.

A ray of sunlight forced him out of his reading zone when it insisted on shining into his eyes. The weight on his back reminded him of the dragon sleeping there which probably needed to be fed at some point. She had slept during his studies but when he moved a little, she shot up.

‘Come on. We need to get you something to eat.’

Her face said something along the lines of: Finally, you giant oaf. I´ve been hungry for AGES.

‘You were sleeping soundly on my back. Stop looking at me as if you´ve been nagging me for hours.’

Holly just shrugged her tiny wings at him and made a beeline for the door at which she impatiently huffed until he opened it enough for her to slip through.

 _I_ _´ll wait for you in the kitchen._  There was a short pause in which she turned to look at him, before she “flew” downstairs.

_Moron._

He was pretty sure he just had just heard her in his head. Ok. Fine. WHAT?!

‘Holly!? ALASTAIIIIIIIIR!?!’

He ran after her. She waited in the kitchen. Just like she said she would and the biggest smirk was plastered all over her little dragon face. It matched Alastair´s grin. He had already fetched her a bowl of milk and some carrots.

‘Alastair... Why do I have the feeling that Holly just talked to me inside my head?’

Alastair was not even grinning anymore. He was full on laughing now. Stiles waited a solid minute for him to answer. And it obviously took him a great deal of self-control to calm down.

‘I´m sorry I didn´t warn you. Dragons are usually able to communicate right from the start, but they have a rather… wicked sense of humor? Yeah that´s probably the best way to put it.’

Stiles only rolled his eyes at him. Then he turned to Holly.

‘Moron? Really? Do you think I´m feeding you after this? Because I´m not.’

She looked at him and then she slowly turned her head towards her bowl. Oh great. Right, she already had something to eat. So much for teaching her manners. He´d have to talk to Alastair about this.

‘This is really creepy Stiles. I can see your clothes moving but I can´t see your face… I don´t like it. Do you mind if I make you visible again? It was funny yesterday. But now, naaah.’

If Stiles had been capable of destruction spells at this point he would have annihilated Alastair on the spot. Or at least tried. But since that wasn´t an option he threw the next best thing in his vicinity which happened to be an apple. It didn´t even reach Alastair but stopped midair to hover 30 centimeters in front of his face. From there he plucked it out of the air and bit into it.

‘Why thank you Stiles, I didn´t know you could read minds. I really wanted that apple.’

Then he smirked and with a wave of his hand Stiles could feel a strange energy moving over him. It felt like being slowly submerged into warm water. After it was over Stiles, in all his glory, was …

Still Invisible. He raised a completely invisible therefore ineffective eyebrow at Alastair who frowned.

‘Something should have happened. Wait, let me try again.’

He got up and walked over to Stiles, touching him by the hair and shoulder. Then he concentrated for a moment until his face finally lit up.

‘Aaaah there it is. I knew your magic couldn´t be THAT strong. I misjudged your bases. I was totally wrong about the source of your magic. No wonder it didn´t work.’

With that he tapped Stiles´ head and stepped back. When Stiles looked down to his hands he smiled.

‘Finally. So what were you talking about? Source of Magic? Base?’

Alastair nodded.

‘So you haven´t heard anything about that yet? Good. I wanted to explain that bit to you. It´s important. Get yourself something to eat and sit down, this is going to take a while.’

He herded Stiles over to the living room where they sat on the couch. Holly ran out into the garden. Before Stiles could yell after her to come back Alastair already shook his head.

‘It´s okay, she won´t be able to leave the premises. She is safe doing whatever she wants to do.’

Stiles didn´t doubt it for some reason. Alastair seemed to know what he was doing an at least he wasn´t nearly as secretive as Deaton. Probably…

‘Sooo where to start… Aaah I know. The six bases of every humans magic. Some of them can change sometimes but that´s rare. The bases determine how you access your magic, how you work it, what it feels like, how it manifests and so on.

First of all: Feelings. It´s how you access your magic. Usually it comes down to seven feelings with which to access and activate your magic. They are happiness, love, compassion, desire, hate, pain and fear. Merlin that grungy, depressed hipster used a mixture of “sadness and despair” but you know, that was just his fancy way of saying he used pain as an activator.’

Alastair rolled his eyes. Stiles thought he might have heard something along the lines of fucking assholes muttered under Alastair’s breath. Way to talk about the most famous magician of the western world.

‘You have to understand that it doesn´t make you a bad human to activate your magic through any of them. Especially hate. I had a promising student who took too many risks to prove people were wrong about her. It didn´t exactly end well.’

‘Wait. So if someone is using love to activate their magic but then they get hurt badly and stop believing in love they can´t use their magic anymore?’

‘An important question actually. No they´ll start using a different emotion. This is actually the base that changes most often along with aura colors because they´re an environmental factor.’

So two of his bases might have already have changed before he even knew about them. Awesome. Absolutely brilliant.

‘Then there is your element. Magic based on your element is easier for you to learn because you´re more in tune to it, obviously. Also your element manifests in the way your magic feels. That´s why it´s rather easy to identify electricity users.’

He produced an electric spark with his hands.

‘If you know what I mean. The elements we´re talking about here are water, air, earth, fire, mind and electricity.’

Stiles thought for a second.

‘What does mind feel like? Or earth for that matter?’

‘You know with earth it´s mostly smell. My daughter Ivaine uses earth and when she works magic it smells like the air after rain and sometimes like forest. Mind manifests in memories. Long forgotten ones that suddenly flash through your mind.’

‘Huh. What is my element?’

‘Your element is air. But let´s continue, shall we?’

‘Yeah go on. I´m listening.’

‘Ok where were we? Ah I know. Magical power source. Where does your power come from? From yourself?’

He tipped at Stiles´ sternum.

‘Or do you draw your power from your surroundings? The first thing is called Stars the second moon because, you know, stars shine by themselves whereas the moon is only reflecting the suns light. Which means if a Stars user runs out of power and still continues they start to use up their life force and by that can easily kill them. There is also that thing that moon users are able to draw power from other people. Ever heard of vampires? It´s socially not accepted but it´s an interesting sex technique.’

‘Uuuhm… ok.’

Holly chose this moment to come back with an abnormally big carrot between her gums.

 _I hunted this carrot for you._ With this she dumped the carrot to his feet.

‘Thank you, Holly. Shall we… uuhmm share it? Since you caught it?’

_No. It_ _´s my food. Just because I caught it in honor of you doesn´t mean you get to eat from my carrot. You may have some though if you really want to._

‘I guess I´m ok, thanks. Your carrot, so you should it yourself.’

Alastair had watched the whole exchange with interest. Then he coughed and just continued while smiling to himself.

‘The fourth base is Direction. South, east, north or west.  How and which direction are you giving your magic? Which means, do you use your hands, like me? Or do you need equipment, are you completely silent or do you have to use some ridiculous spells. This is one of the things that may change in really rare cases.

The fifth thing is affiliation. I don´t know which idiot called it that but it only determines how egoistical your magic is. White in this scenario would be altruistic. Black egoistical and grey everything in between. A white mage will probably suffer backlash if they intentionally hurt another person but healing is like second nature to them. A black mage has a really hard time healing others but his destruction spells need little effort. I think you understand the concept.’

‘Grey mages have neither disadvantages nor any advantages?’

‘Exactly. Now last but not least sixth: Aura color. The colors of your aura are determined by your current state of mind and your character traits, how you feel. It´s highly environmental. So there is always a mix of them but one color is almost always dominant.‘

Stiles looked at him expectantly.

‘Your bases are pain, air, stars, east, grey and red. When I tried the first time assumed they were fear, mind and moon and so on. So my spell didn´t work.’

That was a lot to process. Stiles didn´t like the bit about pain being his activating feeling but he supposed it made sense since it was a pretty prevalent emotion for him ever since his mother had died.

‘And what are your bases?’

Alastair grinned.

‘What do you think?’

Stiles thought about it. He´d seen Alastair use his hands. He was helping Stiles without expecting anything back as far as Stiles knew although he wasn´t going to bet on Alastair was.

Apart from that he wasn´t sure.

‘Compassion, water, south and gray? I don´t know about the rest. That’s a little too high for me.

‘It´s compassion, water, stars, south, grey and silver. Your guess wasn´t bad. Try to sort every person you meet like this. To ask is considered rude among some nowadays.’

‘Why is that?’

Alastair seemed annoyed for a split second before he grinned again.

‘By knowing your bases I can work magic on you. People today are too paranoid. They´re afraid to be controlled. It´s ridiculous by the way. You can´t control someone´s mind and just force them to do anything,- you can only make them do what they would have done anyway.

However, apart from that, strong illusionists are usually not interested in fucking with anyone magical, instead they just con the rest of the world. It´s easier and brings more money. Although when you get too naughty I do step in.’

‘What are you? Some kind of supernatural police?’

‘Nah. I´m just stopping the ones with magic from harassing the ones without magic too much. And only when someone really needs to step in. Can´t have a supreme ruler of the world just because he is necromancer and decides to go on a rampage to avenge his girlfriend and as dessert take over the United States. No, I won´t have that.’

Stiles regarded him with what counted as a Derek face. Alastair might be a competent witch, but saving the world didn´t seem to be within his pay range.

‘Sooo since I´m visible again and had my breakfast and obviously ´ve gotten my first lesson, can you empty the fridge now, so we can go shopping?’

_____________________________

 **October the 26th, 2013  - Noon**  

It took them solid two hours to sort through the fridge and clean out everything that wasn´t edible anymore or has never been edible to begin with. Stiles had already made a list so when they were shopping they quickly got everything plus some things for a surprise party, that Alastair couldn´t keep secret. Also some clothes because Stiles was in desperate need of something to wear.

They had nearly reached the estate when Alastair got a call.

‘Crowley. What´s up?’

His face went from annoyance to worry in a matter of seconds.

‘I´m on my way. Don´t move. Call the pack in, I don´t want them roaming around and getting killed. Make sure that Derek is not on the streets. Yes. Seconds Aurelia. Keep him breathing. There should be enough time left to remove it.’

Derek? His Derek? Well, not HIS his Derek but his Derek? Stiles was wondering if his Derek knew he had left. If so, he probably didn´t care. It was most likely someone particularly hotheaded named Derek from the local pack. Chill Stiles. Derek is not in this city. He´d never look for you so keep your chill and don´t get too excited. You´ll only be sad when you realize your hopefulness had been pointless.

Alastair ended the call and brought the Mercedes to a sudden stop.

‘Stiles I need to go. You bring the car back to the estate. Don´t leave. There is a very vicious and dangerous Siren running around and it´s hurting people. Stay safe.’

With that Alastair disappeared right from the driver seat.

‘Ok, sure. I´ll drive the expensive Mercedes back to the estate… Yeah, totally a good idea.’

Muttering he moved over to the driver seat. It’s only a few blocks he reminded himself.

‘Nothing to worry about. Nothing at all.’

 

Stiles was surprised when he arrived unharmed. One must be lucky at least once in a while, he thought.

Just after he was finished with bringing the groceries into the kitchen, Holly wasn´t a big help with that but she had tried, a woman came barging through the door.

‘Stiles? Are you ok?’

She was panting and her red hair had clearly been tousled by the wind. She looked a little younger than Alastair.

‘Hi, yeah. I assume you´re Aurelia? Ivaine´s mother? Did Alastair send you?’

What Stiles had expected was her to say yes, smile maybe and explain what the hell was going on right now. What he didn´t expect was her to roll her eyes and grind her teeth.

‘I´m going to kill that idiot someday. He always lets people jump to conclusions, when really he could just tell them.’

Now Stiles was completely at loss of what was happening.

‘I am Ivaine. Alastair Crowley is my father. He hides it well, huh?’

‘He what?’


	7. Coming out of the Cold

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr for anyone who´s interested:
> 
> Sunny: http://fangirl-oracle.tumblr.com/
> 
> Devil: http://random-devil.tumblr.com/

**October the 26th, 2013  - 02.00 pm**

 

‘You are his daughter? I thought you were about 3 or 5 not…’

He gestured towards her and meant about 25 or something. Holly jumped from the counter to inspect her. Her talons were scraping over the floorboards.

‘Don´t get wrong ideas. I´m 286 years old. He put a spell on me. You really didn´t know who Alastair Crowley was before you said yes to being his student?’

‘I didn´t even know his last name to be honest. Wait. WHAT? What the fuck?! How old are you?! No, how old is HE???‘

‘My dad is roughly 900 years old.’

He brushed his hands through his hair in disbelieve. His breath hitched and his mind was racing.

_Chill Stiles. Breathe in and out. He is still a good person. And she is too by the way. You have nothing to fear. In and out, ok?_

Holly was sitting in front of him staring into his eyes. Purple orbs of fire.

_You are safe, ok?_

He nodded as a thank you. She had stopped his panic attack before it really started. So back to business. Ivaine was already worried.

‘Well, of course I said yes, two separate werewolf packs advised me to contact him... Though actually it was more like. “You should go there.” And when I didn´t go the other pack came and told me to move my ass because... You know actually it was kind of threatening.’

Looking back, it really had been threatening.

She shook her head, snatched a bucket of ice cream out of thin air and grabbed two spoons. Then she let out a deep sigh and waved him to follow her into the living room where she fell down on a couch. Meanwhile the groceries started unpacking themselves.

‘Chill Stiles. He´s not so bad. Concerning magic he is the best teacher you could have found. Some would definitely kill to be in your position. He was the goddamn disciple of Merlin before that one blew himself into oblivion. So don´t worry.’

He fell down right beside her and grabbed a spoon. Holly draped herself on his shoulders. Merlin, huh?

‘But how? And why didn´t he tell me?’

‘So the thing is, he doesn´t like to show off. I don´t go around introducing myself ‘Hi, I´m Ivaine Mc Allister. I´m 286 years old’ either. He assumes people in the supernatural world know him by now. Which they do. Since he is 902 years old. By not telling  you, he didn´t intent to deceive you. That´s hardly possible with his reputation.’

‘So he wasn´t joking earlier today when he told me about necromancers trying to take over the world?’

‘Nope, that was a rough couple of weeks.’

‘And when he rushed out this afternoon? Is the end near?’

‘No, it was just personal. An angry siren went after his friend Caesar. He tried to reason with her when she first started hunting here but she wouldn´t hear any of it. Said that humans didn´t need to be protected and that she´d kill as many as she liked since they deserved it. Caesar wouldn´t have it of course. So he tried to find her again, which had been unsuccessful until a few hours ago. She cursed him with a painful death. I couldn´t help him so my girlfriend called Dad to help. He sent me to keep an eye on you, make sure the wards are in place.’

He took a spoon full of ice cream and absent mindedly fed it to Holly. Caesar, the werewolf he had met the day before yesterday

‘Will Caesar survive?’

Ivaine gifted him with a bright grin.

‘Of course. Dad is as capable at removing curses as he is at placing them. My teenage years were not that much fun. I promise you that. Not all curses end in agonizing death. Some are just plain mean. That and the 18th century being an awful time to be a teenage witch.’

Stiles gulped, remembering the research he'd done on the Salem Witch Trials for a School project.

‘Don´t worry nobody tried to burn me at the stake. But you know. We lived in this big ass house near Dublin. Women were believed to be either stupid or inherently evil. It was mostly tolerable, a bit boring though. But enough of that. Tell me about yourself.’

Her bright smile dimmed at his sour expression. He never imagined relating to Derek, but here he was making the same face the second his past was mentioned. Suddenly he felt bad for calling him a sourwolf. But then Derek probably wouldn´t want his pity.

‘I´d rather not talk…’

She cut him off quickly.

‘I´m sorry, you don´t have to tell me anything. I was just curious. Dad hasn´t taught anyone since I was born. Apart from, well, me.’

He thought about it. Eventually he would had to tell someone. Ivaine seemed like a trustworthy person and he desperately needed someone to know. Holly nudged him with her head.

 _-You could tell her bits and pieces. She is a healer, a very good person. I like her_ \- Holly said in his head and curled herself tighter into him. _-She is a person you can trust infinitely. A shining light of benevolence-_

‘It´s ok. I mean. Well, I think I want to talk to you about it. Parts of it at least. I´m called Stiles…’

‘Is that your true name?’

‘What? No. My name is…’

‘Ssshshshshh! Don´t tell me. Don´t tell anyone! Names have power. That is not just a saying. It´s the painful truth. No one should ever know your real name. Not even your true love for forever and ever and ever. Nobody if you can help it.’

She smiled at him and patted his shoulder. There were only a handful of people who knew his name and remembered the spelling, less were able to pronounce it. His Dad and maybe some of his teachers. Scott always failed to remember it. And Lydia, she probably knew. He would have to contact her sometime. To make sure she was ok. Maybe get some info on banshees first and send it to her.

‘I´m sorry, you are new to this and I feel like my Dad forgot to tell you. Please continue. I´ll shut up now.’

‘Ok, well Stiles. My Dad is the sheriff in my hometown. I don´t think anyone in my family ever practiced magic but I could be wrong. Um, my best friend Scott was bitten by a werewolf two and a half years ago. Actually no, he´s not my best friend or any kind of friend anymore. He has been alpha for about a year now. We battled some really strange things together. Hunters, an Alpha pack, a Darach, a Nogitsune and a Kanima, but apparently I wasn’t welcomed anymore. When I tried to explain - he wouldn´t even listen.’

He bit his lips considering what to tell.

_Should I tell her all of it?_

Holly didn´t move.

_That_ _´s for you to decide, dude. It´s your story so you can decide whom to tell. I would tell her, though, if I were you. She is the brightest human I’ve ever seen._

He tried very hard not to roll his eyes.

_You_ _´re like 2 and a half days old, Holly. I don’t think you´ve seen enough humans to make this a valid assessment._

_I_ _´ve seen enough dim humans in the supermarket to say she´s extraordinary. Thank you very much, Stiles._

‘Tell me some other time if you want to, Stiles. Don´t push yourself.’

‘Thank you.’

They sat in comfortable silence for a while and Stiles actually tried the ice cream now. It was delicious.

‘So a Kanima huh? I´ve knew one once. Was yours conscious or…?’

‘There were two actually. The first on was Jackson – local high school jock and a total pain in the ass. We kidnapped him, so his master, this totally douche hunter named Gerald Argent who was also Scott´s girlfriends grandfather couldn´t abuse his power any longer but Jackson escaped and of course only remembered that we kidnapped him, so he filed a restraining order. We did figure it out in the end, so now he´s a werewolf and lives in London, so there is that.

The second one was a girl. She wasn´t really a Kanima but a Chimera. She wasn´t conscious and then she was killed. And yours?’

`Not conscious. She was controlled by a colleague turned enemy of my father. This guy tried to make her kill me because he thought just because she was a really pretty girl and I fucked her once or twice I´d not defend myself if she tried to kill me.’

Stiles nodded.

‘Yeah right, sounds like a really sensible plan to me.’

They grinned. Stiles felt much more at ease now. A sense peace like he hadn´t felt in months. It was soothing to talk to Ivaine. Her very presence felt like a warm and cozy blanket of safety.

_I_ _´ll go hunting, since you two seem to like each other just fine._

Stiles nearly chocked on a laughter. He shook his head and grinned.

‘Holly, stealing carrots from the garden is not hunting.’

Suddenly Ivaine was interested.

‘She already talks to you? That’s soon. What ´d she say?’

While Holly left through the cat door Stiles recounted.

‘She said you´re shining in a bright light. That you´re trustworthy. She insulted my intelligence and now she just told me she would go hunting for a carrot.’

Ivaine smiled softly.

‘Let her think of it as hunting if she wants to. You know, I was there when she hatched. Her egg was red, orange and turquoise. I´ve never seen a baby hatch that was so differently colored from its egg. Normally the hatchling would have the same color.’

‘Who gave her the name Holly?’

Suddenly Ivaine´s expression darkened to a long suffering look.

‘Dad.’

She paused.

‘He always wanted to name a dragon Holly. It has to do with the stupid pun that’s possible when you ask her to spit fire. Holly, fire! Holy Fire. Get it? It´s awful.’

She sighed. Stiles shook his head grinning with mirth.

‘I wanted to name her Aisling and Aurelia wanted to name her Aithusa after the BBC Merlin series. But unfortunately dad was faster.’

Holly chose that moment to jump on his shoulder from behind.

‘Aaaarghh!’

_Stiles it_ _’s me. It´s ok._

His heart was beating loud and fast.

_I_ _´m sorry I startled you._

‘It´s ok- I was just surprised.’

_Good. Can you wash my carrot? There is so much dirt on it._

Defeated he looked at Ivaine.

‘I´ll just go wash Hollys´ carrot.’

As he rose, Ivaine stood up as well and followed him to the kitchen. She stored the ice cream bucket in the freezer.

‘I think it´s time for lunch, don´t you ? Have you ever eaten Cornish Pasties?’

‘Not really.’

‘Awesome. You´re gonna enjoy this. My mom used to make them with me.’

______________________________________________________________

For the rest of the day Ivaine supervised his attempts at controlling and channeling his magic. After trying for roughly 2 hours he managed to produce a small scarlet light in his palm.

‘See you´re a natural at this.’

He looked at her in doubt.

‘How long did it take you?’

‘I tried for two weeks straight until I threw a tantrum and accidentally set fire to a curtain. I was 5.’

She smirked.

‘No really you´re special. You had no training and are already in your late teens. To have your magic awaken this late should result in more difficulties. It should really take you longer to figure out how to activate and channel your magic. Have you had any prior experiences with this?’

‘I do, well I think I do. When we needed mountain ash barriers I am, I mean I was usually the one to create them. Deaton said I am a spark.’

And then he had proceeded to ignore all his pleas to teach him more.

‘Alan Deaton?’

‘You know him?’

‘He was in a class I taught about healing methods and herbs twenty years ago. I talk to him sometimes. He actually mentioned you. Sans your name of course. Asked me if I knew someone capable of teaching you. Since I didn´t think dad was interested I gave him a few names to get in touch with. Haven´t heard of him since.’

Deaton had tried to find him a teacher. Stiles was flabbergasted. He had never thought that Deaton would help him with this. Hadn´t anticipated it. It seemed he had misjudged the man.

‘He went missing a couple of months ago.’

‘He did? Do you know why?’

‘We weren´t quite sure. He said he´d be gone for a couple of weeks. Research. He hasn´t resurfaced so far.’

‘Aah. So he didn´t tell you much.’

‘You´ve met the man. He won´t say anything unless someone is in mortal danger.’

She rolled her eyes in agreement.

‘Yeah. It´s not a good trait.’

‘You tell me… So how can I change the color of the light?’

__________________________________________________

**Still** **October the 26th, 2013  - Evening**

The evening came and they continued practicing without having heard from Alastair. While Stiles was rather anxious about the whole situation Ivaine assured him that things would work out perfectly fine. After Stiles had finally figured out how to change his lights´ color they stopped for the day.

Ivaine prepared dinner while Stiles sat on the counter. Together they watched a few episodes of game of thrones while eating a mixed salad from Ivaine´s part of the garden. He learned that none of her vegetables were enchanted. He also learned that Alastair was at fault for the whole “Jack and the beanstalk” fiasco.

The evening went by in a rush and soon he returned to his room.

He was exhausted after the busy day and went straight to bed. This night the nightmares where less clear, but still they left a strong feeling of unease and dread. Hollys presence kept the worst of it at bay. He had just woken up from a strange dream featuring Coach Finstock and a very large banana, when he heard Alastair scream.

‘IVAINE! DOWNSTAIRS. NOW.’


	8. Help is on the Way

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we´re happy to announce that we made it on time this month which I never doubted *cough*  
> So here is the pacemaker you´ve heard about in in the tags, Ivaine is an awesome healer but she is not a heart specialist and since she isn´t she can´t grow one, but maybe one day Stiles finds one or makes himself and his loved one immortal like Al, who knows. There was something I keep forgetting in the notes... a I remember
> 
> This is SunnyFeelings Tumblr: http://fangirl-oracle.tumblr.com/  
> And this is my extra for this fic tumblr : https://www.tumblr.com/blog/random-devil  
> if your interested in my main let me know but fic related stuff including a pic I drew of holly and a picture of how Alastair´s hair could look are on random devil - you are welcome to send us head canons :D both Sunny and I would be very happy to answer your questions and or talk to you :D

**October the 27th, 2013  - Early Morning**

Suddenly he was wide awake. He picked up Holly and hurried down the stairs. Ivaine was already there, making room on the workshop table for the huge man Alastair was somehow able to carry bridal style. When Ivaine helped Al place the man on the table Stiles realized it was Caesar. Badly mauled and hardly recognizable, though.

‘What happened?!’

Ivaine was already concentrating on the man’s many wounds. She fetched a wet cloth out of thin air and got to work.

‘This bitch wanted to make sure he´d die even without the curse. The wounds didn´t appear until after I was done removing it. Can you do it Ivaine?’

‘Move it, dad. I need space and yes, he´ll live.’

Alastair sighed in relief.

‘Good. See you then.’

And without another word he stormed out.

‘I´m gonna kill her. I´m gonna blow her up. This means war.’

Within seconds off passing through the doorway he disintegrated into shadows.

‘Stiles, less staring! Please fetch me some hot water.’

Without another word she returned her attention back to her patient and left Stiles to his task.

______________________________________________________

It already dawned, Ivaine had just finished healing yet another of the several mortal wounds Caesar had suffered, this time an artery that had been in total shreds, when the door to the workshop opened to reveal a young woman. Stiles half expected her to be the siren but the way she looked rather worried at Caesar convinced him otherwise, at least for the moment.

‘Will he be ok, honey?’

Ivaine didn´t even blink.

‘Aury. Go wait with Stiles in the living room. Your brother is going to be ok. But I really need to concentrate here.’

And with that she put a number of powders together, added a green liquid and drew a strange symbol around a deep gash on Caesar´s shoulder with the paste.

Aurelia slipped through the door and Stiles put an arm around her in emotional support when she reached him and lead her to the living room.

‘Hi, I´m Stiles.’

‘I´m Aurelia, but you probably knew that.’

‘So tell me about your brother. Are you both werewolves?’

She laughed. It was a dazzling smile. Infectious.

‘My brother and me, we come from a long line of werewolves. It goes way back to when the first settlers came to America. The story goes that to protect the tribes and clans the druids gave the ‘gift’ to the chieftains. It might actually be the one reason why we haven´t gone completely extinct if you ask me. I believe you´ve heard of the Hale´s? They have been our allies for all that time. Still are, in a way. I myself was born a wolf. We have a cousin, Lynette, that wasn´t that lucky. She got the bite when she was young, but it changed her. If you ever meet her be careful.’

‘Beware of your cousin Lynette. Got it.’

‘Yeah, basically. So… um I wanted to ask you this. Do you know Derek Hale?’

Stiles nearly chocked on his spit. Where´d that come from?

‘Yes, I know him. He sort of restarted the pack down in Beacon Hills that… cast me out. He left before that though, without a word, after his uncle tried to kill him. Again. We figured he needed a fresh start.’

Aurelia bit her lip and averted her eyes.

‘I think he´s looking for you. Your former pack contacted him because their intel suggested you where somewhere near the Great Lakes and Derek lives in Toronto at the moment. So he told them he´d look for you. They seem worried.’

He gritted his teeth and clenched his fists.

‘Even if they did actually worry, which I don´t believe by the way, I will never return there. They cast me out, ignored what I said in favor for someone who they´ve just met. They were my friends. I would´ve done everything for them. I´m not just forgiving them for how they treated me. I´m not a needy ex-girlfriend who´s desperate enough to take her cheating boyfriend back. I´m done with them.’

Aurelia inhaled sharply. A sympathetic expression crossed over her face. She touched his shoulder, the one were Holly wasn´t sitting.

‘I´m sorry about that. That sucks. I didn´t know. But I know that at least Derek does worry about you. He was very concerned when he came to the café.’

‘Derek was worried?!’

That was news. He couldn´t imagine HIM with a worried face or any expression besides scowling at all. Highly improbable. And worried about him? Plainly impossible.

‘Yes, he was.’

If anything, Derek was worried about the fact that Stiles was a puny human and shouldn´t be left alone for more than an hour lest he´d get himself killed or something.

‘Well, I don´t care. If you see him again, tell him I´m fine and not dead yet and that the others can go fuck themselves.’

Her face fell and although it seemed like she wanted to say something she stopped herself.

‘Ok, fine.’

An uncomfortable silence hung between them. She shifted in unease.

_You moron. Now you lashed out at her. It_ _´s not her fault. She just wanted to help. Apologize and restart. She´s Ivaine´s lover and not the one you´re angry at._

Holly was admittedly right.

‘Look, I´m sorry. I´m just really angry at them. They can go to hell for all I care.’

**_Lie_ ** _._

‘Let´s just start over, ok?

‘Yeah, I´m sorry, too. It´s none of my business after all.’

Satisfied Holly cuddled his cheek.

‘So, do you know Buffy?’

‘DUDE! I own them all. I´ve written fanfiction for Buffy!’

Stiles grinned. It was a good thing he had listened to Holly.

‘So what´s your favorite series?

‘You know that´s hard to say Stiles. I´m a nerd. I love lots of series.’

‘Merlin for example? Ivaine told me you wanted to name Holly Aithusa.’

She looked wistfully at Holly.

‘It would have been so nice. It´s a beautiful name, too. Not that Holly isn´t pretty but the reason why Al chose this name….’

He could see a shiver run down her spine. Then he remembered something.

‘So there is this new series ‘Orange is the new Black’. Have you seen it?’

‘No, you?’

‘Nope, not yet.’

‘I´ll get the laptop.’

 

___________________________________________________________________________

**October the 27th, 2013  - Morning**

It was 9 am when Ivaine finally emerged out of the workshop, Caesar levitating behind her. She collapsed on the couch next to Aurelia. With a wink of her hand Caesar softly landed on a couch now turned bed.

‘He´s ok now. There´s still a very small chance for complications but I´m optimistic. So Aury if you excuse me I´ll just sleep now, ok?’

The last part was only mumbled. Two moments later Ivaine already snored softly into Aurelia´s shoulder.

‘She is a great healer you know? In her field there are few who can match her,’ whispered Aurelia proudly. Caressing Ivaine´s hair she went on.

‘She is famous for the salves, ointments and balms she uses. But most of the time she just teaches others so that they can save lives, too.’

Stiles looked at Ivaine.

‘I didn´t know, but then I´ve only known her for a day. What does she specialize in?’

‘Mortal wounds. Fight injuries from talons and claws, some poisons. She could regrow your arm or leg. It would take a few days but she can do it.’

‘I´d like to learn some of that when I can.’

He stifled a yawn.

‘Listen Stiles. You´re human. Considering Al probably barged in around 3 a.m. you should really sleep, ok? I´m a wolf I got it covered.’

Nodding he agreed. Sleep sounded like an excellent idea.

‘See you later I suppose?’

‘Yes, probably.’

They smiled at each other and with Holly in his arms he made for the second story. Back in his room he went straight to bed, Holly laying atop of him. Sleep came swiftly.

___________________________________________

 

_Stiles was out in the preserve. It was dark, he barely could see a thing. He remembered this._

_‘Come on Scott, we need to find the other half.’_

_It was when all this nonsense started. And inevitably as it was they found half of Laura. It was the top half this time. But it wasn_ _´t Laura. Instead Allison opened her dead eyes and sneered at him._

_‘You killed me Stiles. You made the Oni put a katana into my guts!’_

_‘No, no Allison! That wasn´t me. Please, it was the Nogitsune. I never wanted this to happen.’_

_Her sneer turned into utter loathing._

_‘The nogitsune, huh? Did the nogitsune drag Scott into preserve in the middle of the night to find this?’_

_She pointed to herself._

_‘Or did the nogitsune force you to reject the bite Peter Hale had offered you? No, you were afraid and selfish. You wanted to stay human. Stay weak, so you wouldn´t be forced to be responsible. If you had been a wolf as well the nogitsune couldn´t have infected you.’_

_Horrified Stiles stumbled a couple of steps away from her. But to no avail. Directly behind him stood his mother Claudia. Or what was left of her._

_‘Mom!’_

_She clawed at him._

_‘You killed me! You killed me! You finally did it!!!’_

_She was going to kill him in retribution. He knew it would happen. Because he was a coward who_ _´d let his friends down. He deserved it for sure. Suddenly Allison and Donovan were at him n, chocking, suffocating him. The pain was overwhelming. He couldn´t breathe any longer._

_‘YOU KILLED ME!’_

_Tears sprang to his eyes._

_‘Coward!’_

_Boyd and Erica joined them._

_‘You were not smart enough. You are a shitty batman.’_

_‘You killed us!’_

_‘No, please. I´m sorry. I never wanted this to happen!’_

_He begged, using his last breath. Shaking his head._

_‘Traitor!’_

_‘Murderer!’._

_There was no air left in his lungs when he saw the rest of them, all dead. Scott, Lydia, Kira, Liam and Derek. Even Jackson and Isaac were there. His Dad. The moved in on him._

_‘You killed us.’_

He woke with a scream.

_________________________________________________

**October the 27th, 2013  - Afternoon**

Within seconds Aurelia was upon him.

‘Stiles! Stiles, wake up!’

_Stiles!_

Both of them shook him, until he regained consciousness, each with her own method. While Holly had tried jumping up and down on his head, Aurelia had simply taken him by the shoulders and shaken him hard enough to suffer from whiplash. It worked though.

‘What?’

He made a pathetic attempt to react, still shaking and tears leaking from his eyes. The dream had not been real. Of course it hadn´t. However, the crippling guilt he felt was.

‘Stiles can you hear me? It was a dream, ok?’

_Stiles, I_ _´m here. Nothing can hurt you. You´re safe._

Which of course was true which was exactly the problem. He was safe. The others weren’t. They were in mortal danger or already dead. Which had been his fault, from the beginning.

‘Yeah, I can hear you. It´s ok. Just leave me breathe for a second, ok? I just need a moment.’

He took a deep breath. He could handle this. This hadn´t been the worst dream by far. Still the tears wouldn´t stop and he pressed Holly to his chest.

_I_ _´m here Stiles. Talk to me if you want to. I´ll be listening as long as you want me to._

‘Aurelia, would you mind leaving for now? I need some time for myself.’

**_Lie._ **

‘Yeah, sure. Whatever you need. I´ll be downstairs with Ivaine. We´ve prepared some sandwiches and coffee. My brother has woken about half an hour ago.’

With that she closed the door behind her.

Holly waited patiently in his arm.

‘Thank you Holly. I… it was just… I dreamt of my old pack. My friends, dad a-and mum. And I killed them. I killed them all.’

_But you didn_ _´t kill them did you?_

‘It´s was my fault. It´s the same. Besides, I did kill two of them.’

_Do you want to talk about it?_

______________________________________

Holly was the first soul, apart from his former pack, to know about everything. It felt the tiniest bit liberating for him to be able to talk to someone about it. She listened intently and let him talk without interrupting him. For the first time he wondered how she had been able to develop so fast. When he asked her she shrugged.

_You needed someone to talk to, someone to console you and that preferably a year ago. I had to be fast. So I hurried. The rest is going to take some time though. To rush my intellectual growth, I had to halt the rest. I think it_ _´ll easily take a month until I can breathe fire again._

‘So? Ah ok. I see, sorry about that.’

_I_ _´m hungry. Let´s go eat some of these sandwiches. Maybe Ivaine has a carrot for me. I´d also like to try another tomato._

____________________________________________________________

 

They were sitting in the living room when Stiles came downstairs, a tray with sandwiches, coffee, chopped vegetables and a bowl of milk on the coffee table. They were all smiling at him when he came down, even Caesar.

‘So you´re awake?’, said Stiles.

‘So you´re here?’, remarked Caesar instead of answering.

Fucking werewolves.

Stiles sat down in an armchair between the two couches that were occupied by a resting Caesar on the first and cuddling girlfriends on the other side. Holly already started to obliterate the food that had been prepared.

‘Stiles arrived the day after you met him, Cae, which you should have known already.’

He laughed and flinched. The wounds probably still hurt him.

‘Any word on Alastair?’

‘Not yet, but I except him to be home soon. I felt him use a huge amount of magic earlier. He was probably not able to transport himself home and is taking a cab or something.’

‘That happens?’

‘Yeah. Of course. Nobody has unlimited power. First he removed that deadly spell, then he chased her down and then...’

‘ **The fucking bitch is dead**!’

All their heads snapped to the door where a very dirty yet darkly pleased Alastair stood.

‘Let me check on you, Dad. Stiles come with me.’

_I_ _´ll wait here, ok?_

‘Kay...’

Stiles stood and followed them to the kitchen where Al had already shed most of his clothes and sat on the table. His back was covered by a strangely beautiful tattoo in the form of a tree. It moved in a nonexistent breeze. Wait. It moved?

‘You´ve done quite a stunt Dad. I imagine she is just ashes now? However, this,’

She pointed to an enormous amount of scratches, cuts and bruises.

‘Was totally unnecessary and you know it. This whole. I don´t want them to know how strong I really am thing is annoying me. You need to stop it, ok?’

Alastair rolled his eyes and muttered an ‘Aye’ which all of them knew to be a lie.

‘Stiles. I need to take a look at you. I totally forgot. I want to make sure you´re healthy.’

‘There might actually be something you could do. I have a few rips that still hurt when it rains and now that I think about it, um yeah this might be a really good idea...’

‘Rough times with the alpha pack?’ asked Ivaine.

Alastair arched an eyebrow but remained silent. When Ivaine had healed Alastair he jumped of the table. Stiles shed his shirt and stood in front of Ivaine who stared at his scars in horror.

Alastair spoke first. The anger in his voice was barely suppressed.

‘What have they done to you?’

He looked down and saw nothing out of the ordinary. Then it dawned on him. Normal 17 year olds wouldn´t have the body of a war veteran with a considerable amount bad luck. He blushed.

‘The ones that did that are dead, in captivity or were my friends and didn´t ACTUALLY mean to hurt me. It´s ok, I´m used to my skin looking like a rag rug by now.’

Father and daughter shared a look and Ivaine moved toward him.

‘Ok, I´ll just examine you then.’

‘Which is your direction by the way, you were doing all sorts of stuff earlier?’

‘I´m center. I always found it easier to improvise depending on the situation.’

He raised an eyebrow at Alastair.

‘Sorry, she is the only person without direction. I found it was an irrelevant information.’

‘Sure. You filter. I think you just forgot.’

Ivaine rolled her eyes and turned back to Stiles. She touched his shoulder and his ribs and closed her eyes.

‘Why didn´t they find this in the hospital? Your ribs were repeatedly broken and the way they grew back together… the hell happened to your left pinky and your toes? Wait. Have you ever gone to a hospital after you´ve been injured?’

‘No. Sometimes when it was especially bad, Scott´s mum Melissa, she is a nurse, patched me up. I couldn´t really show at the hospital. They would have called child protective services and hospitals a kind of expensive. So, no. I didn´t go to the hospital if I could help it.’

Ivaine stared at him in alarm.

‘This will hurt but after that it won´t hurt ever again.’

He nodded and she moved her second hand to his stomach and he could smell roses and trees as she used her magic on him. It felt happy, at least until he felt his rips break yet again and nearly fell to the floor from pain. Alastair had moved to hold him up while Ivaine continued rebuilding his ribs. After that she moved her hands to all the places his body had been mangled. It hurt like a bitch but not as bad as when he had suffered these injuries for the first time.

‘I´m sorry Stiles. I´m just going to ease your back pain and…’

She withdrew her hands a very serious expression on her face.

‘Stiles your heart. What happened? You should have a pacemaker! ‘

That was news to him. He thought he was fine, well except for the scars, cuts, broken bones and slightly mangled intestines.

‘What?’

‘I don´t know what, but your heart it´s erratic and sick and… did you… did you abuse drugs?’

‘No, no I didn´t- don´t but… I´ve… I have ADHD and was prescribed Adderall for about 11 years.’

Ivaine looked very unhappy.

‘I can´t help with your heart. I´m not even sure what exactly the problem is. I couldn´t even grow you a new one or repair the damage your heart has suffered… I´m sorry. We´ll find someone else and until then we´ll get you a pacemaker, ok?’

‘I don´t think that is necessary. Or is it?’

The serious faces of both father and daughter proved him wrong.

‘How doomed am I exactly?’

They shared a look and Ivaine answered finally.

‘I think we´ll get you to the hospital right now to get an appointment. I have a friend there. She´ll work some magic on the schedule. If you really need a new heart, which I´m not yet sure about, we will figure something out. But first we get you that pacemaker.’

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ______________________________PLEASE READ _ I DON`T WANT TO GET SUED ________________________________________
> 
> Sooo I took a lot of liberty in this one to fuck with Stiles -To my knowledge Adderall does NOT cause heart problems, ok?  
> Not even in this Story, because Ivaine is in no way a specialist and I´m even less, I´m not a doctor or a pharmacist, I´m not even a elementary teacher yet. This is a fictional story and while it might look like the drugs are the cause for Stiles heart problems - they are not. Which will be explained next chapter.


	9. Wait for me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo as you´ve noticed we are a little late this month but we´re both really happy with how this chapter turned out so we hope you agree that it was worth the wait
> 
> Have fun!!!

**October the 28th, 2013**

Ivaine hadn´t joked when she said she knew someone. After he was examined for about 6 hours they confirmed, that he needed a pacemaker and possibly later a new heart. His operation was scheduled to transpire a week later, because even if the doctor really liked (loved) Ivaine, they couldn´t put Stiles in earlier.

He was supposed to return in four days for a checkup. Then come back the next day to stay for 4 days in the hospital to receive 48 hours of pre- and aftercare.

After their rather long visit they went home again. The doctor had sternly reminded them that Stiles was to refrain from any strenuous activities or medication until the operation.

Stiles went to bed that night thinking of Erica, before she had become a werewolf. She must have felt just like him now; afraid his body might betray him.

 

**October the 29th, 2013**

The next morning arrived and Stiles met Al in the kitchen. They had agreed to start with breakfast and then proceed to his magical training. The control – exercise, as Alastair dubbed the light orb thingy, had several features which could be manipulated, and Stiles needed to be able to control them all simultaneously. As a result, they sat in the workshop for hours, interrupted only by a few snack pauses, and worked on Stiles´ control.

Ivaine and Aurelia dropped by the house around 4 p.m. to start preparations for the upcoming poker night.

By then Stiles had mastered the aspects of distance, size and color. Brightness, warmth and durability, continued to be a challenge for him. According to Alastair he needed to be able to control all of them simultaneously which made him insist on repeating this exercise.

‘OK, that´s it. I´m bored. Break time. I´m doing something different now. Follow me, Stiles.’

Thankful for the change in scenery he followed Al outside. They stopped in the middle of the lawn, where Al sank down on the grass and patted the ground beside him.

‘Come on, make yourself comfortable. As stupid as it sounds, we´re going to meditate. If it helps, you can lay down on your back.’

Sighing, Stiles sat down. Meditating? Him? He barely managed to suppress a snort.

‘Good. Since you´re seated now and also highly motivated we can start.’

Sarcasm. His friend. His only defense.

‘Oh wow, I´m so excited, can´t wait to try.’

Alastair chuckled.

‘This isn´t about control. This is about feeling the nature, the energy and the magic all around and within you, getting in touch with your element. I personally hated this because I used to suck at it but Merlin that asshole was relentless. In hindsight that was good for me but… he still was a bitter emo asshole.’

That reminded Stiles.

‘You didn´t tell me you were over 900 years old!’

Alastair raised an eyebrow.

‘Is this knowledge important in regards to your education? I’ll take your headshake as a no. Now be quiet and concentrate. We can talk about my life later.’

Out of arguments Stiles closed his eyes and concentrated on his surroundings. He could feel the sunshine warming his back and a soft breeze was blowing. It was quite nice.

‘Try to find the energies surrounding you. They´re like threads holding the universe in place.’

Stiles concentrated again, felt the warmth of the sun on his skin, heard the birds and wind sing and smelled the grass. He concentrated and concentrated and then finally he relaxed.

He was on the brink of falling asleep when he saw them behind his lids. Well, it wasn´t so much seeing as feeling. Faintly glowing golden strings of energy. When Stiles turned his head towards Alastair he was nearly blinded by the light. The strings that flowed out of him were countless. It was almost like looking at the sun. Following an impulse, he looked down.

‘Alastair?’

‘Yes?’

Alastair replied sluggishly.

‘Why am I shining brighter then you?’

He opened his eyes only to see Al rub his eyes and look at him sleepily.

‘Easy. You’re not constantly using magic to keep you and your daughter immortal AND keep the wards in place. Not to mention a few other things. But before you get any ideas, I´m still stronger then you.’

He looked thoughtful for a second and then smirked.

‘You could beat me, if you trained long and hard enough. You have the talent and the magical resources, the rest is up to you. I wouldn’t mind retirement.’

Stiles stared at him, mouth wide open in shock. He shook his head.

‘You can´t be serious. You were Merlin´s disciple. I could never be…’

‘You could, if you wanted to. But for now back to the basics. Try to spot the differences between ground, trees, air and water. The fountain is behind you in case you forgot.’

__________________________________________

Stiles found the sensing and distinguishing between the numerous sorts of energy to be rather relaxing. The same seemed to be the case for Alastair who, after some time, had started to snore peacefully. He couldn´t stop watching the threads of magic that were flowing around everywhere. Alastair had told him before falling asleep that moon users sucked these threads in.

When he looked towards the house he could see what Alastair meant. Instead of flowing out of Ivaine, she absorbed them all. The strings were bending towards her in a way that seemed surreal.

He then concentrated on the differences between the energy Upon reaching this achievement, he looked further. He was down the street before he knew.

‘Stiles.’

He ignored Al in favor of reaching farther. This time in altitude. From this height, he could see that there were patterns. The treads wove into bigger strands into streams and those into a thunderous river of pure power. A ley line. He was looking at a freaking ley line.

‘STILES!’

He heard Alastair scream in the distance. Annoyed he opened his eyes to look at Al and found himself floating in 50 meters’ altitude. FUCK. Right on cue his floating abilities expired and he started to fall.

‘Fuckin IDIOT’

Alastair suddenly appeared next to him, grabbed his arm right before Stiles hit the ground and they both reappeared safely on the lawn. Neither of them moved. Both of them laying on their back, breathing heavily.

‘You really need to listen to me when I talk to you.’

‘OK.’

‘Seriously, never do that again on your own.’

‘OK.’

‘Good. Then congratulations. You just managed to shadow travel. Which you shouldn´t have been able to do yet but fuck that apparently.’

Stiles heart was beating without a real rhythm. He tried breathing in and out slowly but couldn´t quite get it to calm down.

'You want me to fetch Ivaine, Stiles? Nearly dying can get the healthiest guy into shock and subsequent cardiac arrhythmia.'

Stiles shook his head. It was going to be ok. If he just calmed down enough it was going to be ok. Just when he thought about giving in though, Holly appeared out of nowhere and sat on his chest.

_Stiles, you know when you die_ _,_ _I_ _´m gonna burn you back to life, right? Besides, you don´t wanna die yet, do you? There is so much to learn and to do. Now don´t concentrate on your own heart for a change but try to hear mine. That_ _sound fast to you?_

Stiles tried to hear anything besides his heavy breathing and erratic heartbeat but he couldn’t hear anything at all.

'Do you even have a heartbeat Holly?’ he coughed. ‘Are you sure that you aren’t already dead?'

She grinned, as far as a one could call it that, before he heard a faint fluttering once and then nothing again.

'What are you? A turtle?'

_Naah Stiles. I_ _´m a fucking dragon. Your fucking dragon as long as you live. Which will hopefully be for a loooong time. So_ _,_ _feel better yet?_

Surprisingly Stiles felt better. His heart had stopped stuttering and he was breathing just fine.

'You´re a genius little one, ` said Alastair grinning proudly.

Her head snapped towards him.

_Tell him that even though I love him_ _,_ _he is a fucking pain in the ass and I won_ _´t forgive him naming me for a freaking pun. And if I ever hear him calling me ‘Little One’ again., I will eat his heart._

Stiles laughed wholeheartedly.

'You´re gonna have to watch out for revenge Alastair.’

Alastair smirked, leading Stiles to believe that he knew exactly what Holly had said, thought, transmitted… whatever.

'So about the whole shadow travel thing, why is it called shadow travel if all I did was follow the stream of light?'

'That´s because it looks like you´re swallowed by shadows for everyone around you. Some call it ley line surfing. You know it´s really hard to do that. How did you manage to get up there?'

'I wanted to follow wherever the energy threads lead, to see what it looked like from above, I didn´t think my body would follow me...'

'Ah. Interesting. Well then cut that out for a while, will ya? I don´t need you to turn up dead somewhere. I got a reputation to loose.'

'Reputation...'

He snorted.

'I bet they see you as the somewhat eccentric rich uncle that helps them out if something is going awfully wrong.'

'Yeah, you´re not totally wrong about that.'

Stiles looked up to see Ivaine and Aurelia standing in front of them arm in arm and looking disapprovingly.

'Food is ready if you´re hungry, you know? It´s not like I’ve been calling for 5 minutes. I even sent Holly out to fetch you, but I see that worked out great.

'We could eat outside today. Before the winter comes. It´s nice today.'

Both women snorted. Aurelia answered this time.

'Yeah, it´s not like you change the weather every time you want to eat outside. Winter included.’

__________________________________________________________________

 

In the end they ate outside on the grass.  It was peaceful and Stiles felt a strange mixture of homesickness and belonging. Nobody commented on the few tears that escaped his eyes.

After eating they all gathered inside and brought the multiple snacks Ivaine and Aurelia had prepared upstairs. Caesar was the first to arrive and Aurelia smirked when he and Al hugged.

'I´ll explain later.', was the answer Stiles got from Ivaine regarding his raised eyebrow.

They sat down in the living room to wait for the last two people.

Second to arrive was Misha Tsukishiro, a relatively small man. He headed straight towards Stiles. looked up at him and said, 'I see dead people.'

'What?!'

'I see dead people. Your mother has a message for you. You need to stop blaming yourself for her death. It was an illness and there was nothing you could have done to save her. She also apologizes for what she put you through. She never meant to hurt you. And she hopes you can forgive her for saying those hurtful things when she was in a daze from the illness.'

Stiles stared at him with his mouth slightly open.

'What are...'

'MISHA!'

Ivaine crossed the room and punched Misha’s arm.

'Why would you do that? In front of everyone? Couldn´t you wait?'

Meanwhile Stiles wasn´t sure how to feel. His mother wanted to apologize to him? Ridiculous. She must hate him for what he had become. Abandoning his dad and his friends. She probably looked down on him in dismay.

'I´m sorry Stiles. Misha sometimes forgets that bluntness is not always the best option.'

She gripped his hand and led him upstairs to him room.

'Are you ok? We probably should have warned you.'

'I´m not sure. What the hell was that?'

Ivaine bit her lip.

'Misha, you see, believes in absolute honesty. He started doing this after coming out as trans. He was in the closet for most of his life and couldn’t bear to continue living a dishonest one, so he decided to be truthful from then on. But sometimes he overdoes it a bit.'

Stiles head was spinning.

'So he said the truth? But that can´t...'

Ivaine hugged him. His mother was sorry. He should stop blaming himself. But did she not know about Donovan and Allison? He wasn´t blaming himself because it was fun, but because it was HIS fault. His mother must have been biased. He was relieved though that her illness hadn´t followed her into the afterlife.

'Stiles do you think you´ll be ok? Or do you want to abstain from this poker night? Nobody would mind. We´d understand if you wanted to think about Misha’s words on your own for a while.'

Stiles pondered about not participating but after he saw Holly sitting next to him on the bed he decided he would be fine.

'I think if Holly sits on my shoulder I´ll be fine. You mind?'

 _Absolutely not you big oaf. I love you_.

So they returned to the living room.

'Ah Stiles.', said Alastair.

'Meet the latest arrival. Louisa Hoenig. Famous witch hunter and descendant of Hänsel and Gretel.'

Stiles stared at her in surprise.

'THE Hänsel and Gretel from Grimm´s fairytales?'

'Exactly. My great great great grandma was Gretel,’, she said with a smile, before abruptly turning around.

‘Alastair why do you always introduce me like that?'

'Because I like to mention your ancestry. I knew them. They tried to kill me.'

'Yeah if you don’t mind, I´ll continue to NOT believe the killing part. You´re a good person. Most of the time.'

Alastair chuckled.

'They didn´t care. It was the dark ages. I was a witch and therefore I was free game. They didn´t care.'

'Yeah right... So, you must be Stiles. I was looking forward to meeting you. I heard you already met Misha?'

She patted his shoulder.

'Don´t be mad at him. He´s special. And my favorite moron. So believe me if I tell you it wasn´t his intention to hurt you:'

Stiles grinned.

'Yeah, Ivaine already told me that he took an oath of honesty. More or less at least. I´m ok and I won´t hold a grudge over it.'

He looked at Misha who seemed relieved.

'But you´ll have to tell me stuff about the afterlife now. I´m not gonna let you get away easily.'

Suddenly Caesar spoke from his couch in the back of the room.

'So now that everyone knows Stiles, let´s play poker. I´m gonna bleed you bitches dry this time.’

And so they went upstairs to play poker. It was a very nice evening, Stiles got to know everyone a little bit better. He later learned that Misha made an exception to the truth rule. Being a professional gambler, he cheated with his ghosts like a dirty cowboy and thus was no longer welcome in the whole city of Las Vegas. Since he was filthy rich by now Misha didn´t care much and continued to play underground with mobsters. A rather dangerous hobby in Stiles opinion.

'So about the afterlife, tell me everything you know.'

Misha scratched his neck.

'You see Stiles. They, the ghosts don´t really tell me. I know that some souls are answering when you call. Apart from that some stay on this plain until they get closure. There isn´t much more I´m afraid.'

'You realize that this isn’t a lot of information? So what do you do with your `I see dead people power’?'

Misha smiled happily.

'See, that is a lot easier to answer. I bring the souls that can´t rest the peace they deserve. You´ve seen ghost whisperer? Just like that. But I also perform white rituals so that no necromancer can misuse their soul for anything wicked unless they want to participate. I also take their pain away. Clean haunted houses, where the ghosts that have faded still pollute the air. It’s a very rewarding job. I sometimes get paid, but not very often. Which is why I´m now getting paid by the people who are responsible for a lot of the ghosts I´m putting to rest.'

'Ok, I´m not sure if I should pity those mobsters,'; said Stiles.

'You would not be wrong to do that. He bled Las Vegas dry last time,’, Louisa chimed in.

She was loud, happy and generally a little like Malia, only less feral and more trained.

He later found out that Louisa was a competent witch and witch hunter but preferred to solve disputes she was hired to help with by namedropping Alastair. It seemed to have saved her a lot a stress though Alastair told him that most of the disputes where solved by her own fame, but Louisa didn´t really acknowledge that.

Alastair won the biggest pot shortly before midnight and after all of them, except Alastair, offered Stiles to take him on a work field trip sometime, they went home.

He and Al sat together afterwards to watch Charmed (Alastair’s pick). Two episodes later Stiles fell into his bed, exhausted and done and content. Holly laid curled beside his head, her pink scales glowing softly. He couldn´t remember the last time he had been this happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr for anyone who´s interested:
> 
> Sunny: http://fangirl-oracle.tumblr.com/
> 
> Devil: http://random-devil.tumblr.com/


	10. When faced with tragedy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Sunnyfeeling you all gonna get to now the exact dates when everything happens, so you won´t be confused by the timeline 
> 
> I hope y'all enjoy this chapter and Sunny and I will be thrilled should you choose to leave a comment
> 
> Sorry for the delay - we know that we said we were gonna upload a new chapter every month roughly around the 1st but real live got in the way and we still aim to do one chap per month, but since college started again we may not be able to always be on time
> 
> Anyways,
> 
> Lots of love Sunny and Devil

**October the 27th, 2013**

Howell called Derek the following day around noon to inform him, that although their Alpha wasn´t in immediate danger anymore, the person or in this case siren who had caused this was still somewhere with a furious witch hot on her heels. He told him that the witch had ordered all of them to stay inside and far away from the harbor until the siren had been “obliterated”.

It was good to know that the Greywolf Pack had strong allies. Although he found the thought of a witch running around obliterating people a little unsettling.

The rest of the day he just sat in his hotel room, brooding. There wasn´t much to do except maybe call the Sheriff. But without any news he decided against that.

When someone knocked on his door around noon the following day he wasn´t surprised since he had heard Howell and Lester bickering the moment they arrived on his floor.

'So, any news?', he said while opening the door.

Lester grinned when they entered and nodded. Howell just looked tired.

'The bitch is dead. Crowley made a fucking mess but he killed her. One would think he was able to clean up his own messes but no, we had to clean it up.'

'Crowley?'

Derek faintly remembered the name.

'Yeah, Alastair Crowley, calls himself the witch, he´s the best friend of our boss and a fucking asshat. He exploded her! Can you imagine? Lester nearly puked.'

With that Howell fell down on Derek´s couch directly beside Lester who looked slightly affronted. As he leaned against the wall, Derek noticed exactly how little space was between them now. And how Howell was mooning over Lester. Poor fellow. Lester seemed rather oblivious.

'I have a very sensitive stomach, thank you very much. You said it yourself, he exploded her. That´s not something I want to be accustomed to.'

Suddenly Derek remembered why he knew the name Crowley. His mother had told him and his siblings about him.

'You mean Crowley. The one that gets called when shit really goes down?'

Howell snorted.

'Yeah, that guy. Our boss is lucky they´re friends. Under no circumstances would I ever want beef with that guy. I mean our alpha searched for a whole week until he found her. Crowley did that in less than 14 hours and made mincemeat out of her in about 20 minutes.'

All three of them huffed. Then Lester remembered something.

'Anyway, the boss is back to full strength. Mostly at least and we´re here to take you on a walk. You must be really bored. You´ll be able to meet him tomorrow.'

The so called walk was actually a run. It had been full moon just five days ago but at that time Derek had been too busy worrying about Stiles to really enjoy it. They drove out of the city and into a densely forested area where they ran until all three of them were exhausted. Or rather until he was exhausted since Howell and Lester opted for picnicking rather than running after 3 and a half hours.

He was returned to the hotel at around 4 a.m. and went straight to bed.

________________________________________________________________________

**October the 29th, 2013**

 

The next day he woke around noon. After getting ready he left for the cafe, to meet with Caesar.  The involvement of Crowley in this mess gave him a major headache.

He found the cafe without problems and entered into the middle of a heated conversation. Which stopped the second he opened the door.

The air smelled faintly of Stiles. In the back he could he Howell and Lester bickering again.

'You must be the one my sister has talked.'

A handsome man with long black ponytail and a beautiful, tanned face sat behind the counter on a stool.

‘Caesar, I assume. Thank you for meeting me. I think your sister already mentioned my query?’

'A pleasure and yes, she told me that you´re looking for someone.’

‘Stiles.’

Caesar nodded.

‘Yes, Stiles.’

He came around the counter and led Derek to a table in the corner. Derek hadn´t expected him to be so tall.

‘Come, sit. Howell will get you something to drink. There are a few things we must discuss.’

Derek schooled his features to not betray a thought. He was within reach of Stiles. He could feel it. But somehow…

‘Stiles is safe. He has no intention of returning.’

Derek snorted.

‘I gathered that much when he ran away. He wouldn´t have run if he didn´t mean it.’

Caesar looked at him pained.

‘See, I met him and Aurelia talked to him. It´s a mess. He´s a shell and his pack bond´s broken. I´m not sure if he notices, but well, we can smell his depression and anxiety, not to mention  see his poor physical health. It´s bad. Ivaine, Alastair’s daughter, monitors the kid´s body to make sure it does not give out until he´s regained his strength.

Alastair keeps him occupied – teaching him magic and stuff. Making sure the kid eats and has a normal daily routine. At the moments it´s somewhat ok, because things are still new for him. New and exciting but most of all distracting. If my clan had a shaman or an emissary like in the old days…

Whatever happened to him back in Beacon Hills, I don´t know, it must have been really bad.’

Nothing could have prepared Derek for Caesar´s speech. He knew that Stiles had had problems back home but he had never noticed how severe they were.

With his face in his hands he groaned. And to top it all of a broken bond. He remembered how bad it was just after the fire. Or when Laura died. He hadn´t even allowed himself to really bond with Erica and Boyd but their loss had still hurt like a bitch. Leaving Beacon Hills again after the whole Kate debacle had hurt too although he had really tried not to form any bonds at all, unwilling to let his love and trust in others hurt him yet again.

‘It´s my fault. He is just a human. I should he tried to keep him away from all this supernatural shit. Gerard Argent had him kidnapped once. He never talked about it. I assumed he was fine.’

Lester chose this moment to show up and deliver two mugs of black coffee to their table.

‘Come on Derek. I don´t know the kid, but once Howell found out about us, he was so intent on joining that nothing could have deterred him. I don´t think you could have kept him out of it if you tried.’

Howell snorted in the distance and then proceed to have a coughing fit. Someone suggested he deserved the fit for making Lester fetch the coffee. Another pack member patted his shoulder. ‘There, there…’

Derek had a feeling that Howell didn´t become a werewolf because of the supernatural aspects.

He didn´t feel better. It was definitely partly his fault that Stiles had suffered. He knew he hadn´t been a good alpha, there was a reason that Laura had been his mom´s choice, but to be reminded of his own shortcomings like this hurt. Sure McCall had been Alpha in his absence but maybe he shouldn´t have left. Maybe if he hadn´t left…

‘Hey Derek. Stop. Don´t beat yourself up about this. Alastair and his daughter Ivaine care for him now. I think Ivaine set up an appointment with a therapist. He´s going to be fine. And when he is ready, maybe he´ll go back to Beacon Hills.’

Through gritted teeth Derek asked:’ Can I meet him? I´d like to make sure he is ok. His father needs to be sure.’

Caesar nodded.

‘Yes, I can understand that. You´ll need to ask Alastair. He´ll decide what’s best at this point.’

‘Thank you.’

‘I´ll bring you to him. Are you free now?’

Derek felt himself relax and wondered why he had been so tense in the first place. Then again he supposed the revelations about Stiles´ massively declined health would have such an effect on anyone not dead inside.

‘Yes. Let´s go.’

He downed his coffee and followed Caesar out winking Howell on the way out.

‘See you.’

__________________________________________________________

 

Derek was nervous. Awfully nervous. He wasn´t sure when he had last been this nervous. It was ridiculous. He wasn´t a middle schooler preparing to ask out his crush.

They had walked to a rundown neighborhood and now stood in front of a shabby house. It was raining gently. He´d have to kidnap Stiles. There was no way he would let Stiles stay in a place like this. How was this Caesars definition of ‘being cared for’. His stomach churned with the thought of having to face Alastair Crowley in order to get Stiles to comfort and safety.

‘Relax Derek. It´s an Illusion. To keep the uninvited away.’

With that Caesar opened the garden door and the illusion dispersed before his eyes. He blinked the rain out of his eyes. It somehow reminded him of the transformation scene in the beauty and the beast Disney movie. Not that he´d ever admit to having seen it.

‘Let´s wait here for a sec. Alastair should feel the disruption in the wards and…’

‘And who do we have here?’

Holy smokes.

‘Uuuhm, Derek? Uh no, yes, eh Derek Hale.’

Ah, Derek nice one. Smooth.

God this man was exactly his type. If he wasn´t sure that Stiles was straight (because let´s face it Stiles had been mooning over Lydia since forever and then the thing with his cousin Malia) Derek would be worried for him because this man seemed to be a sex god. Suddenly Derek was utterly relieved that he had figured out his sexuality years ago.

‘Derek, huh? Have you remained in your hotel room like I ordered you to?’ he said suggestively eying Derek up. He could almost feel the witches gaze slide up and down.

‘I-I d-di…’ he swallowed hard.

‘Yeah. I remained there.’

Caesar grinned knowingly at Alastair who had quirked an eyebrow.

‘So, what do I owe the pleasure?’

Derek then regained control over himself.

‘Stiles. I´m here to see him.’

All the playfulness vanished from Alastair´s features. He laid his head to his side and his eyes narrowed dangerously to slits. Derek started to feel goosebumps and a shiver ran down his spine. His instinct screamed danger.

‘Tell me, Derek, do you happen to know the people that called themselves his “pack”?’

Uh huh. Yeah. Well fuck. Fight or flight?

‘I do, actually. But I haven´t seen them in a while, which is probably why his father asked me to find him.’

At this the impending feeling of doom that had been building within him lessened. He shuddered.

‘Is that so? So you had no idea about Stiles’ heart condition? Or his rapidly declining mental health?

‘No, I´m sorry.’

Alastair looked at Caesar for confirmation. After he nodded Alastair turned back to Derek. The hostile demeanor slowly vanished but instead of returning to flirtations Alastair straightened up and became serious.

 

‘Why should I allow you to talk to him, to jeopardize his already fragile mental state? I know nothing about you except that you know him from Beacon Hills. It could well be your fault. I don´t even know what happened there. He can´t even talk about it. All I know is, should I ever meet that Scott boy, is that he will not know what hit him. So spill.’

Derek felt utterly uncomfortable.

‘Scott is a true alpha… He led the pack when I lost my status. He is a just leader, lawfully good but often blind. Stiles´ father told me that a guy was missing, Donovan, and Stiles must have killed him in self-defense since Donovan was about to literally eat Stiles. The corpse was taken by the guys they´re are fighting down there at the moment and later revived by some asshole, who had been betraying them all along. Stiles tried to tell them something was fishy, but they didn´t listen.

I left them only six months ago, figured they didn´t need me. Left the country and now live in Toronto.

Stiles´ dad called me, because someone saw Stiles here in Chicago and a day later in Detroit. I felt guilty because I shouldn't have allowed him to be involved in this supernatural crap so I told them to stay put and came here to look for Stiles myself.’

He made a pause and gathered his courage. Alastair freaked him out and he didn´t want to be on the receiving end of his wrath.

‘May I talk to him? Just for a second?’

Alastair regarded him with a strange expression. Derek couldn´t make anything of it. He couldn´t smell anything and his usually perfect hearing was giving him nothing, not even Alastair’s heartbeat.

‘I´m not sure if that is a good idea.’

‘Hey what´s going on here, Alastair?’

Alastair´s posture became stiff at once.

‘Stiles.’

It was painful to see him. He was so thin. The sacks beneath his eyes darker than usual, the shine of his eyes dulled and worst of all his liveliness, his bouncing and at times annoying energy was gone.

Derek could smell it, too, his despair, buried at the moment but seething, waiting. And the broken bond. It made itself know trough a distressing and bitter smell. Derek wanted someone to cradle Stiles close, make him forget the bad things. A tiny portion of him wished he was that someone, but he silenced it immediately.

‘D-Derek? What are…you doing here?’

With a broken pack bond he wondered how Stiles was still so strong. Laura and him had mourned in solitude for weeks and they still had had each other at the time.

He steeled himself for what he was about to say. He didn´t want to remind Stiles of the things that had broken him but he had to ask, for the sheriff.

‘Stiles, I-I´m here to…’

Stiles lifted his hand with the trademark Jedi gesture. Derek eyes widened in confusion.

‘I´m not the Stiles you´re looking for.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I tried  
> And I tried my best  
> But I´m jackshit at programming so here is our urls because I´m that bad that I couldn´t even get an already coded thingy sunny researched for me to work properly
> 
> Sunny: http://fangirl-oracle.tumblr.com/
> 
> Devil: http://random-devil.tumblr.com/


End file.
